DIL BECOMES A VAMPIRE - Dan and Phil Play: Sims 4 #57 (30 October 2018)

Wed Oct 31, 2018 3:07 am

itasca00 wrote: ↑Wed Oct 31, 2018 1:15 am Wow! This video was...a lot. I started out bored (at least as bored as I can be watching Dan and Phil). But the video just kept getting better, and I was fully satisfied by the end. Here are my highlights:

The first thing I noticed was that the pumpkins are back in a pyramid.

[0:13] Phil grabs ahold of one of Dan’s horns and shakes it. Dan is not pleased.

[0:33] Dan claps, and Phil imitates him. Dan is indignant, and it’s very cute.

[4:02] I don't know what Phil's hand motion here is, and I'm pretty sure I don't want to know.
P: So we’re gonna have some marriage-bonding, husband-wife action. *sawing/fisting? hand motion*
D: They cannnnnn…
P: Not that kind of action. I don’t even know what this is.
D: Maybe. Whatever that is, I don’t think that’s an option in The Sims.

[4:52] Maybe Dan should consider sleeping with one eye open from now on...
P: I think it would be quite satisfying to just bite into someone’s neck. Do you know? Just imagine the texture. Just be like, *bite sound.* No? Just me?
D: Do you want me to respond to--I don’t understand anymore. Okay.

[7:31] Just because it’s an option doesn’t mean it’s something she wants to do.
D: You can--
P: You can WooHoo in a coffin?!
D: *looks at camera*
P: That’s--
D: Tabitha.
P: That’s dark.
D: Tabitha, get your life together.

[8:02] Yes, my definition of “marriage-bonding, husband-wife action” is definitely having my husband flirt with a strange man he's just met.
P: I dare you to do a flirty introduction.
D: A fl--Really?
P: Do it!
D: What could go wrong?
P: I just want to see.
D: Sure. Flirty introduction.

[9:22] I love how Dan knew that Phil would just have a vampire pun ready to go.
D: What’s the pun, Phil?
P: Um, why do vampires need cold and flu medicine?
D: Why?
P: For their coffin!
D: Turn into a bat, and fly into a ceiling fan.

[9:32] This whole exchange is so absurd! Dan and Phil preface this video by saying that they feel like Tabitha’s been neglected. Then, they get to the mansion and completely ignore her. They have her husband flirt with another guy and say that Tabitha’s totally into it. To be honest, when they got to this point and said, “Ask to Turn,” I had forgotten that the guy was a vampire and thought they were asking the guy to turn Dil gay. Because that's totally what Tabitha would want for Dil.
D: Okay, so what other are there? Let’s see. “Give Fake Bad News.” Why would you do that, you freak?
P: I don’t know. I think we need to get back on the good side. I mean, it seems like Tabitha’s into all this vampire stuff.
D: Very true. She’s havin’ fun.
P: So I--I think we should do the ultimate flirt: “Ask to Turn.”
D: Turn Dil into a vampire?
P: Yes, she’ll love it!

[10:17] Kinky-minded Dan returns with...haematophilia.
D: Oh, my God. He’s sucking Dil. Looked like he kinda enjoyed that. Not gonna lie.
P: I hope everyone was watching that and not just listening to what you were saying.
D: Oh, okay. This is--This is, like, kinky now. They--
P: This is intense.
D: It’s full reciprocal blood drinking, and he’s like, Get off me. You don’t deserve--Enough of that. And now they both barfed.
P: Oh, no! Tabitha saw it. She didn’t like it.
D: She’s like, Uh, get away from my man. Only I get to suck on his wrists..

[10:47] So this trip to the mansion is supposedly all for the sake of Dil and Tabitha's marriage. Dil gets pleasured by the vampire, but Tabitha just gets a suave kiss from Dil. Interesting.
P: Should we get Tabitha to ask as well?
D: No, that’s fine. I think that now we can just give her a suave kiss, and everything will be fine.

[13:27] Dil is all about getting some action from the vampire, but Tabitha is not at all about getting that same action from her husband. Okay, sure.
D: She looks like she’s--
P: She’s not enjoying it.
D: --kind of enjoying it?
P: No. I don’t think she loved that.

[14:32] Great life advice, tbqh. I know nibbling on other people is a part of my daily routine.
D: He's a “Guilty Drinker.” He becomes embarrassed when he nibbles people.
P: Without permission. I mean--
D: I think that’s fair enough.
P: That--He should.
D: That--That’s how we should all be.

[16:21] Dan and Phil continue to make Dil and Tabitha's relationship sound healthy and loving:
D: So Tabitha needs a day and a bit to turn into a vampire.
P: Yeah.
D: Clearly, they’re a bit tense ‘cause of all the nibblin’, so I feel like Dil should just leave her.
P: Mmm.
D: And maybe have some fun exploring his new vampire powers with some people that aren’t his family.
P: Okay.

[18:40] Quite the moral statement by Dan:
D: Does this kill her?
P: I don’t think this kills her.
D: ‘Cause I’m not saying that we’re trying to kill her.
P: It’s just--
D: I’m just saying that if she did die--
P: It’s just a deep drink.
D: --and disappeared, then I think we would have done something good.

[19:19] I guess Dan has now decided that Dil and Bob are going to get married.
D: And now he’s Googling, “Um, killed my stepson future’s clone mom”

[20:02] I don't even know what to say. Phil's a dork, and I love him.
D: I think we should go back and see our wife--
P: Skedad.
D: --’cause, uh, she might have a bit of a bubbly tummy if you know what I’m sayin’.
P: Yeah.
D: She wants a bit of a nibble on her husband.
P: You mean she’s gonna diarrhea?
D: No, she’s turning into a vampire…
P: *laughs*
D: *pokes Phil in the face*

[21:41] Phil is a big fan of bat WooHoos. Who could have guessed?
*Dil and Tabitha WooHoo as bats*
D: Right. Oka--Um.
P: That is amazing.
D: Is this legal?
P: I don’t know.
D: Where did the appendages go?
P: I loved that.

[21:55] Um, I feel like there's a lot to unpack from these comments, but I don't want this post to get flagged.
D: Okay, well, while they’re both flirty, why not do it? Just two eternal lovers doing what they do best. That seems cramped!
P: That’s very cramped!
D: I dunno, man. You’re gonna put your elbow--
P: Ooh! It’s floating.
D: Wow. Okay.
P: This is--This is steamy.
D: That is somehow kind of disturbing.
P: I’m a bit scared.
D: The--The rocking is very gentle.
P: Oh! Oh!
D: Oh, there we go. Bats just flew out. Did it just--Did Dil just shoot out tiny bats?
P: I think so. This is going on for a while.
D: Woah! Okay.
P: Wow.
D: One of them just hit the spot. And that was a bat--Okay. Wow.
P: Just ejected them from the coffin.
D: That was the most passionate love making we’ve seen this entire series.
P: It was.

[22:49] That’s one twisted sense of romance, Dan.
D: I think, as if this were a horrible nightmare, we should just walk them ceremoniously out--
P: Oh, no!
D: --into the morning sun--
P: Dan!
D: --and say, “Goodbye.”
P: Oh, my God.
D: “Go Here Together.”
P: Oh, God. I feel sad even though this is the alternate universe. This is sad!
D: No, it’s romantic. It’s fine.
P: Is it?
D: Yep.

Alright! Two videos in a row with the correct merch links! Let's keep this up, boys!