Dan and Phil try PUMPKIN CARVING! (31 October 2018)

[lefthandedism]

[lefthandedism]

That video was so cute, and similar to the way monster pops was (though amped-up to 2018 levels), it was very much laced with sexual tension lmao. I really enjoyed it!

(2:00) - D: "We will never be those instagram people Phil"
(4:24) - P: "Right, that's the last time we're touching knives today" The look they give each other after that is A Lot. I really expect nothing less from them though
(4:54) - P: "I'm getting close, Dan *breathy exhale*" Just. Great.
-I love both of them mocking Phil for pointing out how pumpkin seeds work
(5:43) - P: "We could start a new life as pumpkin growers" Always using 'we'. Good. Feels organic.
(5:47) - Start of a tangent about testicles. Very 2018 Dan and Phil lmao
(6:01) - Dan making that gesture while Phil talks about it being sticker than he remembers. Cool cool
(6:58) - P: "So wet"
(7:01) - D: "Phil's going in raw people" ....so like from the previous timestamp until like 7:08, they're just...really Much, and my mind went right to the gutter (not that it already isn't there 25/7 lmao). But wow.
(7:06) - P: "This is not the satisfying finger sensation that I wanted"
-Them continually mentioning boxing boxingbaiting /:
(10:12) - D: "That's how I like to do things *glance at Phil, eyebrow raise* nose first" nose pervert
(12:13) - D: "Wow I can't believe you invented drag"
-neither of them know how to open pixie sticks?? you just pinch them open??
-I think they both know what a "sexy emo" means and is
-The name Derek for Dan's dimple returns
(18:49) - D: "Calm down there bub" bub returns and I love it

[lefthandedism]

ok im posting this BEFORE reading any of your guys' posts because i just...i just need a moment to digest the actual video myself and OH BOY theres just a lot going on here (putting this long boye under a cut cz it long)

0:00 - intro is *chef's kiss*
0:30 - so what youre saying is that you totally couldve been matching costumes/aprons together....but its too "embarrassing", alright
1:03 - dan, internally: "remind me, why do i love you again?"
1:24 - gee, i wonder what other aspects in your lives have you said "lets change/spice it up a bit" to?
1:29 - "spicing it up, this late in the game" says dan, who is seductively fondling a pumpkin. ok
1:33 - all of these mpreg jokes, man they need to stop cz theyre really invading my doujin (or fanfic for the non-weebs out there) tag preferences way too much pls have mercy
2:00 - we couldve had a cute insta story of both yall frolicking through a pumpkin patch, picking your pumpkins fresh from the soil, having some bants......truly, its insta death for all of us fans
3:15 - first of all, i am having a heart attack cz phil is doing his on TOP OF THE STOVE. that thing is like a safety hazard...but lets be real, phil himself IS a safety hazard already. secondly, i am cackling so much at phil's "dead bodies" comment and dans reaction to it
4:10 - d: "WHY DID YOU BUY THEM" this right here screams "DOMESTIC" but also it reminds me of my mom nagging my dad for buying random crap.......................................so make of that what you will
4:23:
4:32 - phil....your craft channel persona is leaking....
4:54 - p: "im getting close dan (moans)" d: (gay panic)
5:09 - d:"im doing a frickin....do...deca...dron, or whatever the hell it is there we go" p: "dodecaHEdron" hello, linguistics phil
5:25 - i love how dans first instinct is to lick it, truly a child with oral fixation
5:42 - p: "i mean, we could start a new life as pumpkin growers" me: ow my heart this alternate universe is very
d: "(dan mumbling something fast) TESTICLES" me: ok, they just had to bring it back into something sexual huh, go get a room
5:55 - interesting how dan would say "flag this", i think this truly shows just how much their rebranding had slowly become more ...idk...really putting themselves out there confidently? dinof and AP, who? im just sayin, if this bit about the pumpkin seeds and testicles was from 2012 era, we wouldnt even see it under the light of day. not even as an extra blooper. i just appreciate how they are more comfortable showing us this side of them now because it really does feel natural and organic...and on that note.......
6:02 - d: "time to get deep (does a...er.....very suggestive arm motion)" p: "its stickier than i remember" can we get an innuendo bingo with dnp 2018 clips?
6:58 - "its so wet" -phil lester, 2018
7:02 - "d: "phils going in raw, people" this guy does this in purpose
7:20 - (dan intentionally makes suggestive noises" phil, in the cutest adoring voice ever: "oH MY GOD, SHUT UP! "
7:33 - "ITS NATURE. THIS IS A RAW ASS PUMPKIN. (????) very unpopular (????)" dan, sweetie, im also a mumbly gemini so i know how it is, but i cannot decipher half of what youre saying sometimes. also, its like, ever since phil started saying the word ass on main, dan just went "this is my life now"
8:00 - dan and his kink of feeding food to his phil makes another appearance
8:15 - i love that adorable snort
8:40 - the moment in which i almost lost it, trying so hard not to openly laugh, in a crowded bus...i love it
9:10 - ok, raise your hand if youre curious as to what phil said to dan in this jump cut
9:35 - pumpkin boxing...ok i love how EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. they do a "play fight", phil almost always gives up or loses on purpose. unless theyre doing a competition or a versus game, then dan usually lets phil do whatever (forfeits, all or nothing) like a cat tolerating its human. my point here is, this is dan
10:15 - "nose first", eh? alright.
10:53 - p: "actually i think you deserve a sweet" excuse me now mr. lester.....did you just say dan "deserves" a sweet?
11:47 - can i just say how much i love dans body language here? he immediately stops what hes doing, drops his arms to his side and turns his body towards phil while constantly maintaining eye contact. hes showing him hes interested and that hes listening well. idk man, its such a small insignificant thing but it just really caught my eye. also side note, i love how both of them are so supportive w their carving designs. theyre giving genuine compliments to each others work and its so...fucking....wholesome?????????? love it
12:50 - ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) such an interesting way to suck that thing into your mouth dan
13:37 - "tis literally putting the choke in choker" istg dan

(everything in between these time stamps was 100% adorable domestic banter )

15:48 - "sexy emo" huh....alright
16:30 - "i wanna be ashamed of you...but im actually really proud of you" dan and phil in a nutshell[/Spoiler]


anyways, this is the most effort ive spent on a time stamp before, that just shows how much i love this, also to end this post, im taking this one out of the spoiler:

17:20 - d: "are you okay?are you okay there?" p: (gentle paps) thank

[/quote]

[lefthandedism]

This video was everything I could have hoped for in a replacement to spooky baking, and I think it was the perfect way to end Spooky Week! Here are my highlights:

• The first thing I noticed is that the length of the video is 20:18. It’s probably just a coincidence, but I like to think that it was intentional.
• [0:55] Phil’s laugh is super infectious here, and I love it!

  P: Pumpkin carving! Which, apparently, are very heavy fruits. Are they fruits?
  D: I really--
  P: Gourds? Guh…seeds?
  D: Gourd isn’t a…
  P: What is it? Vegetable!
  D: This--This is--This is already getting to his brain, people.

• [1:28] Dan and Phil both rub their pumpkins...suggestively? Then Dan puts his pumpkin up against his stomach and pretends he’s pregnant.
• [2:09] Dan bonds with his pumpkin:

  D: Mine’s, like, a bit scaly and ugly.
  P: That’s good!
  D: That’s what my skin looks like when you get closer.
  P: Yeah!
  D: This pumpkin desperately needs an exfoliate. I need a face transplant. I’m really bonding with it already.

• [3:20] “Nelly” appears on the screen when Dan says, “nelly,” turning an otherwise mundane moment into something I found really funny and worth highlighting. Phil is a master editor.

  D: Woah woah woah woah...nelly.
  P: We’re gonna be--
  D: No no no no no. Rewind.
  P: What?

• [4:23] But what about tomorrow, Phil?

  D: Cheers.
  *clink knives*
  P: Right. That’s the last time we’re touching knives today.

• [4:54] Innuendo bingo, anyone?

  P: I’m getting close, Dan. Oof.

• [5:27] Dan pretends to lick the pumpkin guts attached to the top of his pumpkin. Why is he like this?
• [5:33] Dan and Phil are so wholesome talking about the miracle of life like this:

  P: Innit crazy that each one of these seeds can be one of these?
  D: Man.
  P: Nature’s crazy!
  D: Plants are crazy, man.
  P: But, I mean, really. We could--We could start a new life as pumpkin growers. Just off this.
  D: Now, here’s a new one for you, Phil.
  P: What?
  D: Testicles.
  P: What about them?
  D: They’re full of seeds. Aren’t they?
  P: How many babies are in us right now? This is--
  D: Flag this.
  P: This was a mistake.
  D: You have a responsibility to flag this.
  P: Just stop. You said testicles!

• [5:57] Yes, Dan. Phil saying that pumpkin guts are sticky is way worse than you pretending to fist a pumpkin...

  P: Roll up your sleeves. Gotta get in there.
  D: Oh, yeah!
  P: Ugh.
  D: Sleeves are rolled up.
  P: It’s a lot s--
  D: It's time to get deep. *mimes fisting the pumpkin*
  P: --stickier than I remember.
  D: Someone’s just gonna take this video without the video and--
  P: I’m not even trying to be rude.
  D: --just the sound is gonna be disgusting.

• [6:23] Dan really likes the smell of freshly carved pumpkin. A bold preference, I must say.

  P: Why does it stink so much? It’s a fresh pumpkin!
  D: I--That’s the smell of pumpkins.
  P: Ugh! Doesn’t smell like pumpkin spice.
  D: *sniffs his pumpkin top* I like it!

• [6:58] How many innuendos can you count in this exchange?

  P: It’s so wet.
  D: Oh, my God. You’re actually just going in--Phil’s going in raw, people.
  P: I’m going in. Ugh!
  D: More of a delicate, scoopy boy. Here we go.
  P: This is not the satisfying finger sensation that I wanted.
  D: That looks kind of fun, actually.
  P: Wait--Wait for it, though. It’s like the texture...Go right--Go right in.
  D: Oh, yeah! Oh, squeeze it!
  P: It’s so sticky.
  D: Mmm. Yes. Oh, my God. Feel those sinews snap.
  P: Oh, my God. Shut up!
  D: Mmmm. High five, bro.
  P: Bleh!
  D: Mmm.
  P: Ugh!
  D: *barfing noise* It’s nature! This is a raw ass pumpkin. It’s an ass pumpkin.
  P: Yeah.
  D: They’re very unpopular.

• [7:54] Let’s add in another innuendo, just for good measure.

  P: My arm’s gonna be massive at the end of this.
  D: How’d you get that? “Pumpkin carving!” Right, sure, mate.

• [7:58] Dan dares Phil to eat some of the pumpkin guts. Phil is down for licking them, but he’s not so sure about eating them. Eventually, Dan convinces him, and he feeds some to Phil. This is just the kind of content I signed up for when I subscribed to AmazingPhil.
• [8:38] Dan drops the phone recording the video inside his pumpkin, and it lands pointing at him. Then, he says:

  D: Hi! How ya doin’? This is some vore roleplay for the people in the c--Oh, my God! You just stuck your scissors in my eye.
  P: I’m sorry. I forgot they were on my head.
  D: *to camera* Shhh! See you soon.

• [8:52] I guess we can now safely conclude that Phil is an ass man? I mean, surely you must have a deep appreciation for them if you think someone’s ass can be “beautiful.”

  D: Did you know that pumpkins actually grow sideways, so, therefore, every pumpkin has an ugly side where it grew on the ground--
  P: Oh, really?
  D: --and a smooth side.
  P: Ah.
  D: However, as these are pumpkins that represent us, all the sides are ugly.
  P: Imagine if that was the same with humans, so you’d either have like a really beautiful face or a really beautiful ass.
  D: Thank you for that little comment, Phil.
  P: You know what I mean? You could be, like, ugly face--

• [9:21] You okay, Dan?

  D: This pumpkin is my self-esteem: empty.

• [9:31] Dan suggests that they box with the pumpkins, and Phil reluctantly agrees. Dan tries to be rather aggressive, but Phil gives up pretty quickly.
• [10:07] What does this even mean?

  D: Okay, I don’t know why, but I’m going for my nose first.
  P: Nose first...what?
  D: That’s right. I’m tryin’ to do a nose. That’s how I like to do things: nose first. *crinkles nose*

• [11:47] Phil tells a story of when he and his friends went trick-or-treating in June. At the end of the story, Dan and Phil say this:

  P: I wore my friend’s mum’s dress.
  D: Wow.
  P: Yeah.
  D: I can’t believe you invented drag.

• [12:42] Three years ago, hard drugs were off-limits in main channel spooky videos. Look how far we’ve come! Maybe those strippers Dan talked about three years ago will be in 2021’s video...

  D: Alright. There we go. That’s the stuff, right there. *mimes snorting the powder* No?

• [13:33] Dan puts on a candy necklace, and Phil thinks he looks great.

  D: Wow, um, I don’t remember having such a thick neck. That’s really…
  P: It suits you.
  D: It’s literally putting the “choke” in “choker.”

• [13:57] Dan chews obnoxiously on the candy on his necklace.
• [14:25] Again, what does this mean?

  P: I’m having some real trouble with my nostrils here.
  D: Are you?
  P: Yeah.
  D: I’ve seen you have a lot of real trouble with your nostrils in real life, Phil.
  P: Thanks.

• [14:57] Dan screams as he puts his finger through the eye of his pumpkin. The way he vigorously jams his finger into his pumpkin is actually horrifying.
• [15:39] Dan tells a story of how he and his friends went trick-or-treating when they were about sixteen. He went as a “sexy emo,” and he’s not going to tell any of us what that means. (Thankfully, we all have our imaginations, Google image results for “sexy emo boy,” and I’m sure some forthcoming fan art.)
• [16:22] If you just focus in on the last line of this quote, Dan actually sounds very sweet and sentimental.

  D: Alright, I’m just gonna stick my fingers in my eyebrows. I’m a fully trained eyebrow technician--
  P: You are.
  D: --by this point.
  P: danisnotonfleek
  D: I wanna be ashamed of you--
  P: That was good!
  D: --but I’m actually really proud of you.

• [17:12] Dan’s first two reactions to a face that looks like his own are to make out with it, then give it therapy. Interesting.

  D: I would make out with this pumpkin.
  P: Don’t, please.
  D: I would--No, lookin’ at the face. I would give a lot of therapy to this pumpkin. Are you okay?
  P: *strokes pumpkin’s face*
  D: You okay there?

• [18:00] Why is Dan going to smell? That’s what I’d like to know.

  P: That’s gonna smell in about two hours but--
  D: So am I.
  P: --I love it.

• [18:12] I think Dan and Phil and that pumpkin might need to get a room...

  P: He is beauty. He is grace. *strokes pumpkin’s face*
  D: He has a better version of my face.

• [18:33] Yes, conclusion reached: Get a room.

  D: And, wow, have you literally related to a pumpkin more in your entire life? It’s gonna be okay little pump-bro. *caresses pumpkin’s face* Don’t worry.

• [18:41] It’s all fun and games when Dan points his knife at Phil. But suddenly things are serious when Phil does the same to Dan.

  D: Well, I, for one, am shocked that we managed to do this and not stab ourselves.
  P: There’s still time. [unintelligible] joke.
  D: Calm--Calm down there, bub. Had a bit too much sugar.

• [19:05] Okay, Dan.

  D: And I think what we made was an honest reflection of who we are.
  P: My child.
  D: A disappointment.

• [20:14] Dan, I think you need to hear (and internalize) this more than we all do.

  D: And you’re more beautiful than the pumpkin you think you look like.

• I get the distinct impression that Phil wanted to get this video published as quickly as possible after it finished uploading because there are no social media links in the video description. There’s a link to Dan’s channel, but it’s broken because it contains a typo: “http://youtube/com/danisnotonfire.” Phil did take the time to include links to both the dan and phil shop and the AmazingPhil shop, though.