Dan & Phil Part 67: Laughter, Food and Sex

Our two favourite full time internet nerds who never go outside!
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missemma
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hello9217 wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:07 pm Going back on what he said in his last video, making it clear that it's the last dan and phil tour, and solo dan merch modeled by friends (that we presumably don't know) idk this ls left me with a lot of feelings and not good ones...
I wouldnt read too much into it being the last dan and phil tour because let's be honest, what else could they tour after Interactive Introverts? There wouldn't be anything they could do, I think they'll even find it hard to top tatinof tbh.
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liola
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Dan's ramble felt to me very nervous and very much tiptoeing around the edge but I didn't get the feel that he was taking a step back. He was clearly trying to lighten how much people were talking about the dick thing, which WAS the majority of the comments, and really what could he have said? "Ya I suck dick regularly"? To me it actually felt the opposite of what some of you are saying, which is he tried to not make it sound as if he was explicitly saying "I suck dick" but also didn't sound like he was opposite to the idea and the whole trying to include all body parts felt to me more or a nudge towards teen Dan validating his bi heart

I noticed how he stopped himself of saying what Phil was up to a couple of times, it almost felt like he was very focused on talking about his video and wanted to avoid involving Phil. Or it's just usual lack of attention Dan :roftl:

His rant about possibly having an editor/camera guy is interesting to me, I always saw it as some thing not Dan and Phil because of how much they like the control over what they do and that would make involving someone else into the behind the scene things. I wonder if that ties with the openness of the past year?

He seems so excited for tour, it makes me smile! I'm excited to know more about it and I keep side-eyeing him for saying it's about what the people want, mentioning relationship and also telling the "extra" people could take control
Will probably never be over the BONCAS and the beauty of Phil Lester.

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yellowsubmarine
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The way Dan says Guillermo is hurting my ears soo much I wanted to correct him so bad. I relate to his love to Gael García Bernal, his singing in Coco is so beautiful. That movie means everything to me.

I approve of his desire for stand up comedy, he could do it but maybe he will need to adjust to a different audience, idk.

Am I the only one that completely forgot they are actually two separate youtubers that can totally have their own merch? Bc I sure did and I for like half a second was like.. solo Dan merch whaat?? And then remembered and.. yeah
Last edited by yellowsubmarine on Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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000dia000
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Disappointed but not surprised. I hate when he backtracks in moments like this. It's not that people cast aspirations on him or twist his words, but saying "jk" to things undermines what he says. It also undermines his audience who listen to what he says and takes his word for it, only for him to turn it around and make it out that people were blowing it out of proportion. Makes me believe that he should stop with "jokes" and "insinuations" if it just results in him being unhappy about it for whatever reason. It does my head in, and his turnaround undermines everything that he has been building up and working for with his audience for a while now. Now this is something antis would potentially bookmark, bring up on conversation "actually..." to try to prove a point. I actually have no point in this, only that Dan is such drama, so very contradictory, and annoying. It may potentially be damage control, yeah, but he should have enough self awareness at this point to not do things that might make him uncomfortable.

Lol @mentions of solo merch and something about a camera guy(?) That's wild. I think people like to rely on the idea of them being reliant on each other/don't go outside idea but it's strange to hear of work outside of each other. Idk things may change soon #phandivorced
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SquishPhan wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:04 pm
Philena wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:53 pm Conspiracy theory: he taped the "ass" version just in case he got scared.
That thought had entered my mind especially when he pulled it up so fast.
I mean, I believe him that it was already filmed, but it's pretty clear that the point of the liveshow was to clear that whole situation up (thus, why he had that version handy to show everyone).

I don't really know what to think about the whole thing. I guess I think Dan didn't like how the majority of the focus of the video was on the dick thing. It was clearly an important video to him, and I think when a lot of the focus got shifted to the dick comments that he got frustrated, and scared. It's pretty common for Dan to freak out after and backtrack. I don't blame anyone for the comments about the video, because really, the way he phrased it made it open to only one logical interpretation.

I'm slightly annoyed with Dan for bothering to mention it at all (he could have just ignored the whole thing), but I'm not too upset about it. I don't think it was a 'no homo' thing that some people have mentioned - he didn't deny liking dicks, just said that he wanted it to be more gender neutral or whatever words he used. Who knows what he was thinking. He's clearly too up in his head right now (in the dinof video he mentioned being really depressed, in the present tense - and obviously depression is an ongoing, chronic thing, but I took that to mean he's been having depressive episodes lately, not just in a normal chronic state of depression, if that makes sense. Anyways, that doesn't excuse anything and is a bit off topic, but my point is that I think he's all over the place right now (which he's basically already talked about). I think he's still trying to figure out exactly what he wants the audience to know and how he wants to express himself, and the backtracking is part of that.

The stuff from the liveshow didn't really affect me personally (and doesn't change what I see - he's still pretty clearly not straight, and nothing he said in the liveshow negates that), but what frustrates me about it is the people who are going to use the opportunity to be homophobic and shit and start arguments.
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alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 8:51 pmMy prediction: he'll expand on it in equally rambling and confusing terms while ignoring or distancing from the dick sucking part.
Do I get an 'I called it'?

Anyway, I'll just be over here in the corner rolling my eyes so hard at Dan that they start to hurt.
whatdoiknow wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:17 pmI guess I think Dan didn't like how the majority of the focus of the video was on the dick thing. It was clearly an important video to him, and I think when a lot of the focus got shifted to the dick comments that he got frustrated, and scared. It's pretty common for Dan to freak out after and backtrack. I don't blame anyone for the comments about the video, because really, the way he phrased it made it open to only one logical interpretation.
I think this is very true. But Dan needs to learn that if he doesn't want people to talk about his sensationalized sex-related/shock value comments then don't put them in the fucking video?

I don't blame him for panicking and I don't hold it against him if he felt overwhelmed and like he went too far. But I just really hate the patronizing tone he takes when he wants to talk something back and how he tries to obfuscate the entire issue and make it seem like it was all fans misinterpreting, because that's what makes for the awkward/uncomfortable fandom atmosphere where people feel guilty or shamed about something they previously had very happy or proud reactions to.
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hello9217
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All I'm saying is how can you say "I didn't mean for it to be a dick joke" when the actual one everyone was talking about is "things coming in and out of my mouth" as the main dick joke? Like why do this liveshow and have everything set up to prove that people misinterpreted you when that wasn't even the point people may have heard wrong?

It's just super frustrating because all he had to say was something like "I wish people took more from that video and not focussed on the sex part" but he just has to go about things that seem totally patronizing and make me feel like shit because I was on here saying I'm proud dan feels like he can express himself more and then he pulls this 180 and it just sucks.
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liola wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:10 pm Dan's ramble felt to me very nervous and very much tiptoeing around the edge but I didn't get the feel that he was taking a step back. He was clearly trying to lighten how much people were talking about the dick thing, which WAS the majority of the comments, and really what could he have said? "Ya I suck dick regularly"? To me it actually felt the opposite of what some of you are saying, which is he tried to not make it sound as if he was explicitly saying "I suck dick" but also didn't sound like he was opposite to the idea and the whole trying to include all body parts felt to me more or a nudge towards teen Dan validating his bi heart

I noticed how he stopped himself of saying what Phil was up to a couple of times, it almost felt like he was very focused on talking about his video and wanted to avoid involving Phil. Or it's just usual lack of attention Dan :roftl:

His rant about possibly having an editor/camera guy is interesting to me, I always saw it as some thing not Dan and Phil because of how much they like the control over what they do and that would make involving someone else into the behind the scene things. I wonder if that ties with the openness of the past year?

He seems so excited for tour, it makes me smile! I'm excited to know more about it and I keep side-eyeing him for saying it's about what the people want, mentioning relationship and also telling the "extra" people could take control
I totally second this tbh. To me it felt like he was avoiding to deny anything, while also clearing things up. Didn't get a 2012-no-home-dan vibe from it at all :shrug:
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I don't know why I did this, but I transcribed the whole bit where he's talking about his video/dick stuff. It's below if you don't feel like re-watching the video.
"Everyone's talking about dicks." They were... well no they weren't. [laughs] There were a few people. So funny like, when I posted the video, y'know the video is about me... feeling unhappy and trying to find meaning and discussing the concept of authenticity. But the first load of comments was like "that was fun, thanks, liked the video!". Then on Facebook people were like "this was like really deep, and I like Dan, this is quite intense and emotional but that was cool".

But like half an hour later, I don't know where these people came from or who they are, but suddenly everyone was like "DID I DETECT A PENIS?" and I was like "what is going on". And then I realized it was the last line where I said "I put something in my mouth". And this is funny, cuz it's just been entertaining for me to read people arguing about it or not, because I said that, you know, in reference to what makes me happy, which I said was food, sex and laughter, I just referenced that at the end and-and then I said "something".

Which was less about making a big statement at the end of the video, because that wasn't the point of the video. The point of the video was me talking about happiness and how to find it. But um, you know, some people were like "I don't care about anything but the last 4 words". And... it's funny, because I found this video, I actually changed it. Cuz originally, I said "ass" instead of "something".

[plays the video that says "ass in my mouth" instead of "something"]

Yikes! And I was like, okay. And I just, that'd be really funny, cuz like I said, this isn't the subject of the video, it's just me referencing what I said earlier. And I thought ass is funny, cuz eating ass is a meme. And it's nice and non-exclusive. I don't want to exclude anybody, y'know what I mean, everyone has one. Um... and then I listened to "something" half an hour after I made the video, and I was like "oh my god something, it literally only sounds like penis".

And the thing is there's nothing wrong with that, there's nothing wrong with penises and anyone putting them in and out of their mouth. And it's funny because I was trying to not be crude, by changing it, and then it was even more crude. And anyway that's-that's just a... It's quite funny that in the video discussing unhappiness and debating the authenticity of existence, a lot people were like "hmm, penis!" Which was... which was fun.

So... [laughs] I enjoy that. But no, I know that lots of people were like "[whiny voice] no, Dan was making a serious video!" And it's fine, not everybody was obsessed with penises, a lot of people liked the video, and that's fine. It's... people are allowed to have their own enjoyments of things. If some people want to talk about the intense stuff, and some people just want to talk about the funny stuff, and some other people just want to talk about penises, I'm literally not shaming anybody. Y'know what I mean. It's-it's I accept it. I wouldn't have made the joke.
Last edited by tyhane on Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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The thought of Dan getting a camera man/editor is very weird to me since both of them seem super anal about everything...idk I'm definitely going to have to rewatch the liveshow without missing bits of it (because I'm at uni right now lol) before I can really reflect on it
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Please don't hate me, but I feel a bit sad that there is such a frequent negative response to Dan's liveshows in fandom. Just to be clear, I am a big proponent of forums like this one and places that let everyone express their opinions, and I definitely don't want to make people feel like it's not alright to bring up criticisms and things they dislike! I just think it's a bit sad to come away from a liveshow I enjoyed to find that so many people interpreted it in a negative way.

I am too tired (as in literally and I need bed, not in anyway throwing shade :p) to really add anything interesting to the discussion. Just quickly though, I do see why people feel like he is backtracking a little bit in his response, but I think that considering the way he backtracked didn't explicitly make the idea of sucking dick inherently ridiculous, and the fact that he made a point of mentioning ass being pretty all encompassing in terms of gender identity, it really wasn't enough for me to qualify as him no-homoing. I also cut him some slack because I would not be surprised if it was scary to post something that unambiguous and watching people react to it.

I also loved that he mentioned that a Phil video needs to happen, as if it's on *his* to-do list :)
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liola wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:10 pm Dan's ramble felt to me very nervous and very much tiptoeing around the edge but I didn't get the feel that he was taking a step back. He was clearly trying to lighten how much people were talking about the dick thing, which WAS the majority of the comments, and really what could he have said? "Ya I suck dick regularly"? To me it actually felt the opposite of what some of you are saying, which is he tried to not make it sound as if he was explicitly saying "I suck dick" but also didn't sound like he was opposite to the idea and the whole trying to include all body parts felt to me more or a nudge towards teen Dan validating his bi heart
I would think this too...but the fact that he stuck "...because it's a meme and everything" after talking about the ass comment made it feel as if he was trying to downplay the whole thing as a joke that was merely for the lolz. Which confused me. like, 1. if he was referring to the same thing for the in and out joke and the "something else in my mouth" joke (which it seemed like he was?) and he decided to censor "ass" by saying "something" instead, that would imply that what was going in and out of his mouth would be referring to eating ass? which doesn't make sense? and 2. why would he say smth "just because it's a meme" when making such a personal video? he must know that people would think he was being serious when talking about it, as it was a very introspective and serious video?

maybe i'm overthinking, but i just don't understand this backtrack. i respect his boundaries and understand his subtleties in setting up those boundaries through language, but this just felt odd as he knew what ppl would pick up from the in and out joke and yet, still made it and has the audacity to be like "well, actually it's funny because i meant something else and you all are fighting over smth that's not actually there"

it's just slightly patronizing when all we're doing is logically putting two and two together and it left me feeling weird but idk :shrug: maybe i'm just disappointed as i thought he was starting to feel more comfortable explicitly referencing his sexuality and not backtracking on it, so this might just be a selfish dribble
Last edited by zazzed on Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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And he begins with a placenta metaphor...

I don’t know what he was seeing that the dickscourse came “late” and was only a few people. Clearly he wasn’t seeing my Tumblr feed. That all was just weird downplaying/damage control, which is fine, whatever, it shouldn’t be the focus, but you made the joke, twice. I’m glad he didn’t go with the eating ass take as it is more vulgar, even if it’s more gender inclusive and a meme :roll:

Hey, he still spent a good portion of the ls talking about queer media so that’s cool.

Well he sounded pretty final that this would be their last tour and said it would be available to watch on something afterward (when before it was just going to be recorded for posterity). Not taking any of that as bad or the end, just that they’ve talked things through and made some decisions. I appreciate having more concrete info.

He’s thinking again about making more professional videos (he was waffling about that last year, still waiting on that Seven Deadly Sins series). He some how made ‘myself’ plural, twice :lol:

Hey Dan merch! Hoping some of it is accessories as I know a boy who loves his aesthetic, but wouldn’t fit into any adult clothing.

I’m glad I’m not the only one who gets annoyed by him not even attempting to pronounce Spanish names and words correctly. (I’ve been binge watching a Handmaid’s Tale and thought he was starting to say Gilead. Like what the heck are these L’s?) I don’t want to presume that it’s a British thing, but is it?

Okay, it’s been like an hour of trying to stay calm and not be bothered, but it’s not really working. No, I didn’t get 2012 vibes, no I wouldn’t call in no-homo-ing, but it was some really awkward backtracking. Sorry for the post ls crankiness.
Last edited by autumnhearth on Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Regarding his comments on the happiness video I get he put a lot of thought into it and I'm glad for him if he is making content he is happy with so I do kind of hate to be that person but in all honesty if you take the blowjob jokes out I don't think the video would have inspired much discussion at all. It was kind of meh.

It's just a video of a youtuber talking about aiming to be happy/what makes him happy and I feel like I've seen similar videos from at least a dozen other youtubers and this one was not particularly groundbreaking or even that interesting.

Sometimes I can get the frustration when all people are interested in is the Phan or the gay when they make a good video but this one I really don't feel like there was a great deal to discuss outside of the gay. Sorry Dan. :shrug:
Last edited by pearshaped34 on Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:40 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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I guess I just can’t come to any conclusions from what he says anymore, no matter how logical it seems. Maybe I’m being dramatic but I don’t have the strength anymore to be confused by what his intentions are.

gimme that wholesome gaming video asap please
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alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 8:51 pmMy prediction: he'll expand on it in equally rambling and confusing terms while ignoring or distancing from the dick sucking part.

Do I get an 'I called it'?

Anyway, I'll just be over here in the corner rolling my eyes so hard at Dan that they start to hurt.
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alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 8:51 pm I think this is very true. But Dan needs to learn that if he doesn't want people to talk about his sensationalized sexu-related/shock value comments then don't put them in the fucking video?

I don't blame him for panicking and I don't hold it against him if he felt overwhelmed and like he went too far. But I just really hate the patronizing tone he takes when he wants to talk something back and how he tries to obfuscate the entire issue and make it seem like it was all fans misinterpreting, because that's what makes for the awkward/uncomfortable fandom atmosphere where people feel guilty or shamed about something they previously had very happy or proud reactions to.
I definitely agree with this. It's very frustrating and condescending, and it just lends hand to people in the fandom feeling bad and others being mean to one another. It's times like this where I wish Dan read forums like this where there is mature discussion, because I want him to see that how he reacted wasn't really right, and I want him to rectify the situation. It will never happen. I kept waiting for Dan to bring up the situation again later in the liveshow and redeem himself, but that was just wishful thinking. And it's not like I hate Dan - I still like him, but he has faults, and the way he acted in the liveshow is one of his biggest faults.


I fucked up the formatting and I tried to fix it, but no clue what I did. Oops
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I clicked on the liveshow while he was in the middle of his little rant and then just noped the fuck out. Read some stuff back, and now I have a headache. I suppose it had been a while since he caused one. :roll:

You know the fuck what? I'm gonna ignore that and just react to that shit about hiring other people to do your damn job for you. If you think production value is holding your videos back (it's the least of your problems but hey) TAKE A COURSE. REFINE YOUR SKILLS. GET BETTER. Damn ass lazy YouTube sourcing out everything they can. I honestly always lose quite a bit of respect for those who do it (for normal vloggers who have no other jobs anyway).

Solo Dan merch? Potentially interesting but my gut feeling is saying it'll probably end up being meh.

Uuuuugh. I'm annoyed.
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whatdoiknow wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:17 pm what frustrates me about it is the people who are going to use the opportunity to be homophobic and shit and start arguments.
Same. This was one of my first thoughts while watching. :/
alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:20 pm But I just really hate the patronizing tone he takes when he wants to talk something back and how he tries to obfuscate the entire issue and make it seem like it was all fans misinterpreting, because that's what makes for the awkward/uncomfortable fandom atmosphere where people feel guilty or shamed about something they previously had very happy or proud reactions to.
Yes, this. I didn't know exactly how to word how I was feeling (aside from confused/frustrated) but guilty and shamed is exactly it. Being so so happy for him and feeling connected to him as a bi person myself, just to be talked down to and told I was wrong sucks.
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I haven't seen the LS , but could anyone clear up for me about him saying he was going to use other people to edit/film. Did he explain why?
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I've missed the majority of the liveshow and reading the forum, I don't want to catch up. I've got enough of my own frustrations, don't need Dan adding to it. :/
I also thought that if he would address his new video, we'd all be left feeling bitter, and I guess that's true.
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alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:20 pm I don't blame him for panicking and I don't hold it against him if he felt overwhelmed and like he went too far. But I just really hate the patronizing tone he takes when he wants to talk something back and how he tries to obfuscate the entire issue and make it seem like it was all fans misinterpreting, because that's what makes for the awkward/uncomfortable fandom atmosphere where people feel guilty or shamed about something they previously had very happy or proud reactions to.
Sigh. This is just how I feel, too.

I know that there are some YouTubers, and entertainers in general, who we can expect to be very open with their lives, don't seem have a huge separation between their public self and their personal lives, etc., and we all know that D&P are not those people. And generally I've been fine with it and understood and respected it. It would be great to feel like there were fewer walls up, sure, but I get it. But it really feels lousy to feel like we, as an audience, are getting a version of Dan with a few of the filters removed, and to get excited about what's to come, etc., only to have that essentially revoked with a "omg I realized after I posted it that it sounded like I was talking about dick!" comment in a LS.

Honestly it makes me want to check out for a little bit. As I get older I'm prioritizing genuineness, authenticity, and openness more in all of the media I consume (and my personal relationships). I've generally been happy to just enjoy D&P on a different level, and I'm sure I will feel that way again in the future too, but to feel like we're entering a more authentic time and then have that revoked a bit has made me want to step back just a bit for now.
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Idk If its just the phandom knew jerk reaction to it or I'm just rereading quotes of what he said etc but my mood is dropping and I'm seeing everything in a bad light. Honestly it makes me sad how often Dan live shows make me anxious, some times because of how he talks but most of the times because of the reactions.

That said, if this is how people react every time, I don't blame Phil for not being open about things. At least he never backtracks on anything? His approach might be extra slow but is steadier. I wish we had a liveshow of Phil instead.

I'm gonna ignore everything #phandivorce and solo merch meaning they will move out and things like that cause that just makes me roll my eyes tbh
Will probably never be over the BONCAS and the beauty of Phil Lester.

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pearshaped34 wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:37 pm Regarding his comments on the happiness video I get he put a lot of thought into it and I'm glad for him if he is making content he is happy with so I do kind of hate to be that person but in all honesty if you take the blowjob jokes out I don't think the video would have inspired much discussion at all. It was kind of meh.

It's just a video of a youtuber talking about aiming to be happy/what makes him happy and I feel like I've seen similar videos from at least a dozen other youtubers and this one was not particularly groundbreaking or even that interesting.

Sometimes I can get the frustration when all people are interested in is the Phan or the gay when they make a good video but this one I really don't feel like there was a great deal to discuss outside of the gay. Sorry Dan. :shrug:
Yes, absolutely. Like people naturally pick up on the most interesting part of a video, and when a comment is that shocking and straight forward, it's just going to be the thing people talk about the most. Dan knows that. There's only so much you can say about the actual serious content of the video, as it went in circles and didn't even really answer the question of what it even means to "live your truth", so yes, people will fixate on the sex stuff. I get being annoyed by it, but it was his doing.

Also, Dan liked this: just..ugh idk
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liola wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:49 pm Idk If its just the phandom knew jerk reaction to it or I'm just rereading quotes of what he said etc but my mood is dropping and I'm seeing everything in a bad light. Honestly it makes me sad how often Dan live shows make me anxious, some times because of how he talks but most of the times because of the reactions.

That said, if this is how people react every time, I don't blame Phil for not being open about things. At least he never backtracks on anything? His approach might be extra slow but is steadier. I wish we had a liveshow of Phil instead.

I'm gonna ignore everything #phandivorce and solo merch meaning they will move out and things like that cause that just makes me roll my eyes tbh
Right? I love Dan, I love them both, I don't have a favorite. But this isn't the first time when the entire phandom was on a happy, pleasant high, and a live show from Dan brought us all down. He does make me anxious at times too.
On the other hand, the phandom is prone to exaggerating, both in a good way and in a bad way. But I just hate how the mood drops on days like this, it affects me far more than I'd like it to.
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alittledizzy wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 8:51 pm I think this is very true. But Dan needs to learn that if he doesn't want people to talk about his sensationalized sexu-related/shock value comments then don't put them in the fucking video?

I don't blame him for panicking and I don't hold it against him if he felt overwhelmed and like he went too far. But I just really hate the patronizing tone he takes when he wants to talk something back and how he tries to obfuscate the entire issue and make it seem like it was all fans misinterpreting, because that's what makes for the awkward/uncomfortable fandom atmosphere where people feel guilty or shamed about something they previously had very happy or proud reactions to.
This is exactly what always annoys me when Dan does this.
Catallena wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:39 pmYou know the fuck what? I'm gonna ignore that and just react to that shit about hiring other people to do your damn job for you. If you think production value is holding your videos back (it's the least of your problems but hey) TAKE A COURSE. REFINE YOUR SKILLS. GET BETTER. Damn ass lazy YouTube sourcing out everything they can. I honestly always lose quite a bit of respect for those who do it (for normal vloggers who have no other jobs anyway).
Totally agree here.
I really don't get youtubers outsourcing their work. Maybe I get having a team if you want to produce a lot of content, but for the rare Dan vids we get (and I don't think we would be getting more vids if he went this route) I really don't understand it. Especially since he does have the time to brush up on his skills would he want to.
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