bedhead91 wrote: phamnotof wrote:
I'm always so fascinated by how different people get nostalgic for different 'eras' in the phandom. Like I only just joined at the beginning of this year and I quite honestly have this utter disconnect with D&P's early work - like, they're not who I fell in love with, I barely even recognize them. I honestly wouldn't be a fan of them, had I discovered them 4 years ago. I feel like they were different people back then as well as different creators. I do like seeing the beginnings of what I see in them now, because I do think that some things are constant, but overall - not for me, not my humor, not my people, not an energy that would attract me beyond 6 minutes at a time.
So it's always so strange to see people wishing Dan would go back to what I call his 'angry unhappy slutty problematic self' - and this isn't meant to be a judgmement, it's more that... I wonder if we're all just destined to miss the Them
that we fell in love with & if there's an expiration date on my Dan and Phil, too. And it's not that I don't want them to go forward in the journey that I'm percieving them to be on (boy
, do I) - but I do wonder if someday, they go so far that I feel like I can't recognize them anymore. (I guess this makes YT fandoms weird, the potential forever of their existance, and the fact that I'll have to one day decide if it's still for me, no nettwork cancelling my new faves can intervene FUCK YOU MTV eh sorry off topic
. But yeah, I've been thinking about this lately.)
Just to clarify, I'm happy that 2016 Dan is happy and comfortable with himself. I'm not nostalgic for ''past'' Dan. I'm slightly nostalgic for old YouTube sometimes, when the relationship between the creators and the audience was more innocent. I'm going to put the rest of this under a spoiler because this became long as fuck, why.
Oh, yeah, I never meant to imply that liking their (or Dan's, to be specific) content back then meant you agreed with everything they said or even wish they went back to being less happy and content with their lives. Sorry if it seemed that way.
And I guess for me, this way is preferable even as far as experiencing them as celebrities goes, I would just not be comfortable being a fan of someone who I could think of in terms of 'just like me', but that's personal preference and a desire for boundaries. Like I honestly prefer this, I prefer a good production value and a firmly set wall, I've got poorly edited and badly lit friends who make terrible jokes IRL. I like that they're a business now, because I am fascinated by personas, I think they're an artform, good branding is like porn
to me, the gap between persona and private citizens keeps me up at night - this is what I like. I like storytelling and entertainment and I don't find it manipulative, fanservice to me is their job, serve me up, bro, just do it in a way that I can enjoy, sell yourself well or then
I'll be unhappy. I need you to be fictional to a degree, or else I won't be able to project my everything onto you. But again, this is preference.
And as far as the problematic stuff goes, I really don't find "everyone did it" to be in any way a good enough excuse, like I was 13 in 2009 and even then, I knew better than to laugh at rape jokes. I don't blame him anymore, and it's been a joy to see how much he grew up, but I really don't think that his frankly horrible behaviours at times can be excused. Slutty was a weird word to use on my part though (#problematictoo
) - I just meant to overly sexed up image he tried to build, the sultry stares, the dancing - not my thing. But there's nothing wrong with it. And I guess I read anger in a lot of his videos, anger and frustration, and not just cause of Voldy, but also the overall pressure put on him from everywhere, becoming famous, moving, dropping out - he just didn't seem happy. And I appreciate that some people related to that & it indeed is valuable.
I never meant to shit at being a fan of that period or the sense of humor (other than the truly problematic stuff) of those eras, my point was just that it's weird to imagine that one day, I'll be there, too, still loving him, but not having him be the creator I first fell for, because the nature of a potentially never-ending fandom is just odd.