Dan & Phil Part 50: Should we kiss now?

[sparkle]

As BSV pointed out, the 'marriage is a piece of paper' comment really makes me support the theory that they are/will get married for tax purposes.

I think Phil said "marriage is only a piece of paper if the people in it are not happy" and Dan just referenced that in the Sims video.

And damn, the the UK must have some great tax breaks for married gay couples to motivate them to get hitched solely for that purpose!

I know the tax purpose thing is sort of maybe a joke but I have a 'serious' conspiracy theory for you that involves a wedding (Im sad and had cereal for tea, this one is gonna be weird) grab your psychedelic tinfoil for this one.

Dan got cursed. Specifically for travel. Examples:
Dan and Vodka vs deodorant bottle feat. pistachio muffin - nearly blinds self just before trip to Australia
Dan vs US Security - ended up *briefly* deported to the Bahamas
Dan vs taxi cab across London - lost his passport in the wrong timezone on a day of protest with a taxi driver who can't map
Dan vs tennis - ended up nearly escorted out of Wimbledon for not turning up the right car

It is only a matter of time until Danny here does something stupid in a foreign country and ends up having to be repatriated to the UK, in a body bag. Phil, being psychic, can see this on Dan's horizon and has foretold that he, Phil will be the one with him when Dan inevitably goes to meet Jesus. (If you have a civil partnership or are just friends with someone and they die outside of the UK you have zero say over what happens with their body. This is a major pro-same-sex marriage argument, it makes the worst possible thing that could happen while travelling slightly easier.)

So Philly, being a bro, has decided to marry Dan for repatriation purposes before his untimely demise at the hands of foreign travel. Completely platonic, yet functional.

[bluntedclaws]

Sparkle, you're a genius!

[alittledizzy]

I know the tax purpose thing is sort of maybe a joke but I have a 'serious' conspiracy theory for you that involves a wedding (Im sad and had cereal for tea, this one is gonna be weird) grab your psychedelic tinfoil for this one.

Dan got cursed. Specifically for travel. Examples:
Dan and Vodka vs deodorant bottle feat. pistachio muffin - nearly blinds self just before trip to Australia
Dan vs US Security - ended up *briefly* deported to the Bahamas
Dan vs taxi cab across London - lost his passport in the wrong timezone on a day of protest with a taxi driver who can't map
Dan vs tennis - ended up nearly escorted out of Wimbledon for not turning up the right car

It is only a matter of time until Danny here does something stupid in a foreign country and ends up having to be repatriated to the UK, in a body bag. Phil, being psychic, can see this on Dan's horizon and has foretold that he, Phil will be the one with him when Dan inevitably goes to meet Jesus. (If you have a civil partnership or are just friends with someone and they die outside of the UK you have zero say over what happens with their body. This is a major pro-same-sex marriage argument, it makes the worst possible thing that could happen while travelling slightly easier.)

So Philly, being a bro, has decided to marry Dan for repatriation purposes before his untimely demise at the hands of foreign travel. Completely platonic, yet functional.

Someone get this to Marcus Butler, stat.

This all just really makes me want to go sky-diving without a parachute.
/contribution

Lining up pillows underneath you.

(Really, though what it comes down to: sometimes people can't conceptualize what Dan and Phil don't show us, and therefore come to the conclusion that if they don't show us something it can't possibly exist.

Pour one out for Dan and Phil's sex life.)

[sparkle]

Someone get this to Marcus Butler, stat.

Maybe I am Marcus Butler

lbr, If I looked less like a potato and wasn't scared of it being horribly exploitative and was anywhere near as articulate as I am online irl I would honest to god love to spend my time milking those deppy conspiracies in YT videos I genuinely think it is very fun to wildly speculate on tiny idiosyncrasies with Dan and Phil, because they reveal so little.

(btw whoever started calling them Dip and Dots, I keep finding myself doing that subconsciously)

Sparkle, you're a genius!

Thank you - I try

[gnostic]

This all just really makes me want to go sky-diving without a parachute.
/contribution

Lining up pillows underneath you.

(Really, though what it comes down to: sometimes people can't conceptualize what Dan and Phil don't show us, and therefore come to the conclusion that if they don't show us something it can't possibly exist.

Pour one out for Dan and Phil's sex life.)

(Based on AO3 search results, enough people can conceptualise Dan and Phil's sex life that we don't have to worry about it)

[alittledizzy]

This all just really makes me want to go sky-diving without a parachute.
/contribution

Lining up pillows underneath you.

(Really, though what it comes down to: sometimes people can't conceptualize what Dan and Phil don't show us, and therefore come to the conclusion that if they don't show us something it can't possibly exist.

Pour one out for Dan and Phil's sex life.)

(Based on AO3 search results, enough people can conceptualise Dan and Phil's sex life that we don't have to worry about it)

(And I'm grateful for that every day.)

[malday]

[BSV]

All this wedding talk has got me thinking about a specific time when one of them said 'Marriage is just a piece of paper'? Possibly Phil? Can someone remind me when that was? Or did i just make that up?

it's in the video below at 8:09.

he's talking about a ball and chain, wow, don. (indicating phil) maybe you two should just be be friends, mr. "marriage is only a piece of paper". (both of them giggle) (jump cut)

Ahh thank you Lurker!

[darque_red]

(Based on AO3 search results, enough people can conceptualise Dan and Phil's sex life that we don't have to worry about it)

haha sorry i didn't really phrase things right in my last post. I absolutely suck with words. right, back to lurking for me

[somethingsketchy]

(btw whoever started calling them Dip and Dots, I keep finding myself doing that subconsciously)

(I often call them Dip and Flip in my head if that makes you feel any better.)

[alittledizzy]

(Based on AO3 search results, enough people can conceptualise Dan and Phil's sex life that we don't have to worry about it)

haha sorry i didn't really phrase things right in my last post. I absolutely suck with words. right, back to lurking for me

Aw no, don't go back to lurking - there are definitely a lot of people who share your opinion!

Okay I really do wonder now how bigger names guest starring in paid content works. Did Dan get a cut of this, or did he just get asked to participate by Flipside in order to ensure a certain reach for Tom's video?

[obscureDnPreference]

I'm so interested in this sketch. Any guesses for when it will be up?

I guess Tuesday. And then Dan can chat about it in his ls.

EDIT: I'm still watching this so my guess might be disproven as I continue watching,

EDIT 2: Lol. Friday.

[Sakura Selfie]

FYI I got the exact phrase "and I loved the idea" so I think that's kind of generic. It's the first part we need to be concerned about and likely the words girl and dog. My assumption is they're getting a dog and it's most likely a girl.

My first thought was "girl dog" is a pg13 way of insulting someone but I doubt phil is that censored in his IRL texts

I loved the crash bandicoot gameplay, I like it when they actually get into the game they're playing like with the bubble one rather than when they play something just to make a video, it's nice when you can see they're enjoying it.

Marcus is a very dull little man who couldn't make an entertaining video if he was sitting in the middle of a concert with Chris pine riding a unicorn behind him,, he isn't even scraping the bottom of the barrel at this point because he turned that into splinters a long time ago.

[fondsmiles]

you can't be away for one single weekend without there being some new phandom drama can you

I loved the bandicoot video SO much, oh man, I hope they do more of that. ranks high up there with early donkey kong videos or the like, or golf videos, or keep talking and nobody explodes. maybe even higher. maybe the highest (although that may be post-video-bliss speaking).
i loved how genuinely into it they were, i laughed so much when phil's swearing got bleeped and the many of dan's didn't, i was so frustrated with them when it constantly didn't work, it was just phenomenal. thanks for blessing us deppy
i forced my girlfriend to watch the last 5-10 minutes with me and when it was over she only said "they are pretty gay". alright my love (my reasoning that they've actually not shared only attraction to males was scoffed upon until i reminded her that she, in fact, is a bisexual person. she proceeded to say that that's just because she hadn't met the right woman yet, so there is that.)

phil's collab with anthony was ages ago by now but also very much loved by me. bless phil. bless anthony. bless the pup. bless that Content.

[BuffyFiona]

Bandicoot: Everyone has said this, but THIS WAS SUCH AN AMAZING VIDEO OH MY GOD!!!! One of my favourite DAPGs ever, definitely. It just was so entertaining, had a lot of sweet, silly, funny, and flirty moments, which people have already enumerated. Their teamwork on a single player game was so great, and the way they both were supportive but also playfully insulting. It felt very genuine but also hilarious, and basically was the epitome of why I love DAPG.

Tom's Last Week: Interesting how he mentioned this was one of the craziest sketches they'd filmed, but they only had 10 days to get it out, so I wonder how much of a budget they had from Tinder (with a rented studio/set, Dan and other actors, costuming and make-up, lots of extras for 6 hours of filming, etc.) and also what kind of restrictions they gave them (a release deadline, all the rejected scripts and rewrites, etc.).

Dan looked like he was pretty comfortable, which is nice to see ("We ready MaryAnn? We ready Marry Dan?" "I thought you'd never ask!" was dumb funny), I'm very excited to see the sketch!Also, I feel it will be long: "Mate, that's too many gigabytes! That's an irresponsible amount [of footage for First Contact]" And it looks good, but sucks for them that they missed one of the lines I like that Tom acknowledged that having Dan in his vlog/thumbnail will be good for views (like when he told Fiona she couldn't be in the thumbnail when Dan was in the vid), but also didn't film in an unnecessary amount, and just filmed him like he films his other coworkers.


"You gotta edit Dan Howell... look at that, you gotta fix that face of his! Fix that face!" while zooming in on Dan's derp face in a shot... relatable...

Non-Dan-related-at-all thoughts on Tom/Last Week:

I really like Tom, although we disagree on some stuff, and I loved the part of this where he talks about how people assume when he gets backlash it's from "Social Justice Warriors" and the "oversensitive left" whereas in actuality it's almost always from the right, and the people who always insult leftists as being sensitive snowflakes who then get righteously angry (and literally file a hate crime criminal complaint) over a stupid joke about white men tweeted by a white man. Tom really does seem to me to be sorta in the middle on these kinds of things, and so to see him call out the hypocrisy here without necessarily aligning himself with the left is refreshing (especially as he mentions, he used to get hate from the left instead). Reminds me of his effort in speaking and being friends with Lacy Green and other feminist/leftist YouTubers despite not always agreeing with them.

Also I appreciate his openness with his mental health, like when he talks about the effects of being off his antidepressants, or anxiety in the morning.

Also appreciate how concerned he is with getting people exposure when they work with him, not just money, and how aware he is of how much his promos are actually going to help someone, as opposed to just being like "well I credited them and I get this many views so they should be thankful." He is very thoughtful as a collaborative creator, which I respect, and recognizes that he couldn't make a lot of the cool stuff he does without a lot of others' skill sets and assistance.

[iihappydaysii]

Just to add to the pile of bullshit, in his new video, Shane hired a man who pretends to be Jesus to say he ships Dan and Phil. *longest sigh*

[LtrllySusan]

Just to add to the pile of bullshit, in his new video, Shane hired a man who pretends to be Jesus to say he ships Dan and Phil. *longest sigh*

Dont wanna watch Shane, but - the same guy who accidentally invented "Jack Spedicy"?

Also, I want of sparkle's wild conspiracy ride. I am getting too excited over possibly nothing D: Please keep going, I need more

[onetruetrash]

Just to add to the pile of bullshit, in his new video, Shane hired a man who pretends to be Jesus to say he ships Dan and Phil. *longest sigh*

ngl i don't like Shane's behavior towards Dan and Phil usually, but this actually sounds kinda funny

[sparkle]

Also, I want of sparkle's wild conspiracy ride. I am getting too excited over possibly nothing D: Please keep going, I need more

'Sparkle's wild conspiracy ride' sounds like a thread name or a Saw trap

I'm always here to be the resident overthinking sociology nerd but where else can I go from #PhanWedding (next week guys, I'm telling you it's SitC weekend), why they WONT get married in Japan, Dans weird curse, and moving to the Forever Home™

edit: I suppose I could still tackle Vegas, future dogs, and maybe a few other things... hmm...

[iihappydaysii]

Just to add to the pile of bullshit, in his new video, Shane hired a man who pretends to be Jesus to say he ships Dan and Phil. *longest sigh*

ngl i don't like Shane's behavior towards Dan and Phil usually, but this actually sounds kinda funny

If you're curious, Fake Jesus’s exact words were “I only watch DON and Phil they’re so cute and so pure. I ship them hard. Very hard. Even though technically that would be a sin. But I can’t help it so go subscribe to Dan and Phil.”

Jesus does in fact get dan's name right the second time around. and now i feel like i need to call comcast and deactivate my internet lol

[obscureDnPreference]

WHOA NOW. NEW DAN VID

[LtrllySusan]

Wtf! This was amazing and even better cause I wasn't expecting it. So many good references and disses and G notes. Brb need to watch again.

Are they just experimenting with our reactions based on how much pre-hype they build?

[Philena]

WHOA NOW. NEW DAN VID

Eh, the only time I giggled was during the sofa scene with the nail painting and hair straightening whilst singing iwsnt. Otherwise, kinda blah to me. I preferred Anthony's solo content today. He seems so genuine.

Eta: late to the party, but last night's gaming vid was everything

[sparkle]

I played the 'TO JOIN THE BLACK PARADE' bit about 5 times in a row if that isn't me every time I hear that G...

10/10 top quality video Dan - exactly what I needed today

[obscureDnPreference]

WHOA NOW. NEW DAN VID

Eh, the only time I giggled was during the sofa scene with the nail painting and hair straightening whilst singing iwsnt. Otherwise, kinda blah to me. I preferred Anthony's solo content today. He seems so genuine.

I giggled several times, but I'm more happy about the other things this video gave us:

Emo pics of Danthony
New and different apartment angles!!
DRAGGING OF PHIL
Dan in that sweater