Dan & Phil Part 54: Born in the fires of the internet

[archived]

Genuine question: what in the world would they gain from making their relationship public (in an overt "ok here's the truth internet" way rather than "we're existing as we are, make of it what you will" way- the overt one for some reason being the focus of people's theories lately)? I know people just want to Know, but what exactly gives off the impression that D&P themselves want to open that door to the entire flipping internet after years of very plainly saying that's not what they want their content to focus on in any way? "Well they'll still make the same content and act the same on camera" - yeah well then why would they bother changing their public relationship definition then? There's nothing to gain. Apart from the frenzied attention any 'coming outs' attract, which is not at all the kind of attention they seem like they'd be comfortable with.

Freedom I suppose. If they are in a relationship, they probably have to cut stuff out and not do certain things in public. Basically, they could act like a normal couple.

Ok what does that specifically mean beyond how they already act? They're not going to suddenly have the urge to do the chapstick challenge or do the boyfriend tag or basically any amount of PDA. I just feel like people are projecting their own desires of what they want to see D&P do onto what they think D&P themselves want to do, ignoring what they've actually said on the subject. More 'freedom' to relax or whatever (more than they already have..?) for the ~20mins of their day they film to put online every few days/weeks doesn't seem worth the cost of what they'd be giving up.

(Disclaimer - I don't actually believe they are in a relationship)
I don't think you realise how much of an inconvenience being in a secret relationship is unless you are actually in one. By freedom, I'm not really talking about in their own home because obviously we won't see, I'm talking about in public. They can't hold hands in public in case someone sees them, they probably can't go on as many cute dates as they would like because people could be watching and theorising. You constantly have to monitor what you are doing incase it comes across as too 'coupley'. I know they already act close but there is only so far you can push something until it stops seeing as a platonic thing and goes too far. If they came out as being in a relationship, they would want to do it themselves so they could set the record straight - not be forced because someone spotted them being a couple.

Also, you have to remember they are late twenties/early thirties. If they are in a relationship they would want to settle down and think about the future together, maybe getting married and having kids. You can't really do that without saying you are in a relationship.

I'm interested to see what you mean by 'the cost of what they'd be giving up'.

[fondsmiles]

I don't think you realise how much of an inconvenience being in a secret relationship is unless you are actually in one. By freedom, I'm not really talking about in their own home because obviously we won't see, I'm talking about in public. They can't hold hands in public in case someone sees them, they probably can't go on as many cute dates as they would like because people could be watching and theorising. You constantly have to monitor what you are doing incase it comes across as too 'coupley'. I know they already act close but there is only so far you can push something until it stops seeing as a platonic thing and goes too far. If they came out as being in a relationship, they would want to do it themselves so they could set the record straight - not be forced because someone spotted them being a couple.

Also, you have to remember they are late twenties/early thirties. If they are in a relationship they would want to settle down and think about the future together, maybe getting married and having kids. You can't really do that without saying you are in a relationship.

I'm interested to see what you mean by 'the cost of what they'd be giving up'.

as someone who has been in a partly secret relationship for years, I do know that it is an inconvenience, but also that there can be very high stakes for having that freedom, so you rather keep yourself locked away a bit and enjoy what you have in private.
my girlfriend and I didn't hold hands in public for about three years. we didn't kiss. our dates where "friends grabbing dinner together". all for the reason that in our specific situation, there was a lot at stake if we had come out as a couple (to her family and people who know her). so we chose to keep that ambiguous or friendly, and limited clear relationship interactions to when we were someplace where no one who knew her might be, or just in private.
with dan and phil, maybe there's less of an issue of coming out to their family, but still, the stakes for telling the public are really high, as has been discussed plenty here.
and, honestly: they are around each other in their own home 24/7. they don't need to also still hold hands when they are outside. if my girlfriend and i managed with our long distance relationship, they as a (presumed) couple who lives together will manage as well.

in an established relationship, it's not necessary to show public displays of affections to feel in love. and if you know you'll risk a lot if you do show them, you'll probably rather keep them quiet.

[fancybum]

@archived K my work lull is over so I can't respond in-depth but are you sure it's not you who doesn't fully realize the logistics of an LGBT+ relationship, 'secret' or not? Being out online in whatever way won't magically erase any discomfort with walking the streets hand-in-hand without a care in the world. If only it were that simple or that was the reality of the world we inhabit.

And by what they'd be giving up, I just mean their privacy, that part of their lives that's just for them and isn't up for the consumption of strangers online like their friendship is. It would be knocking down a barrier into their personal lives and inviting a different kind of scrutiny.

[malday]

Something I wanna throw into the "agenda to come out" discussion - this is just a feeling and probably amplified by confirmation bias, but to me it seems like Dan is more comfortable with the new agenda than Phil.

It was Dan who showed the moonroom, it was Phil who stuck with the Sleepless Night plan. It was Dan who mentioned foreverhome, who talked about #thatweekinmarch, but it was Phil who seemed uncomfortable telling the leg bruise story. It was also Dan who admitted to "planting seeds", but then there's Phil with his "we are not moving" LS camera angle.

I am not sure what this means, maybe mastermind sparkle can make something of it. It was just something that stood out to me after I saw the bruise discussion on the gaming LS and then reconsidered the last months.

Disclaimer: I am only talking about their online personas, so this has nothing to do with their actual relationship but rather the display of it.

I agree with fancybum.
But also Phil might be more uncomfortable and want to maintain a bit of a mystery, because he has had enough of his private life details scrutinized with voldy, and it's still hanging over his head. With that video he's given all the confirmation in the world already.
People are still putting it up and he's still taking it down.
If he opens up more who can guarantee people wouldn't take that as an invitation to cross the line even more.

[oliviazoe]

can i just say how much i've enjoyed reading through everyone's theories as of late, youre all so intelligible , keen and passionate, i really admire it! you fill the void of days we go without content... so a big thankyou to you all!

[lurker]

Fan service is generally when a writer has a character do something they wouldn't normally do just because fans want it. It's like in a tv show when there is a main pairing but fans really like other people together so writers contrive some reason for them to kiss (Doctor Who was great at that) even though it's a one off moment never referred to again. For dan and Phil, you ou hit the same obstacle with arguing things they do as fanservice that you do with queerbaiting: they are real people not fictional characters. it's pretty tricky to try and assume the motive behind what a real person does because there is more to them than the narrative we used, unlike tv or book characters that begin and end with a story we see the full scope of.

thank you for this well-phrased explanation!

[Offtopic]Also, it literally lasts forever, so lurker, you're set to make PSPC for the next decade :thumbs up emoji:.[/Offtopic]

[Offtopic]i mean, there are less attractive things to make a tradition of, so i probably shouldn't complain i had literally never seen it before, let alone tasted, so when i bought it i made the same mistake as dan and ate a spoonful. i'm still shuddering. [/Offtopic]

Genuine question: what in the world would they gain from making their relationship public (in an overt "ok here's the truth internet" way rather than "we're existing as we are, make of it what you will" way- the overt one for some reason being the focus of people's theories lately)? I know people just want to Know, but what exactly gives off the impression that D&P themselves want to open that door to the entire flipping internet after years of very plainly saying that's not what they want their content to focus on in any way? "Well they'll still make the same content and act the same on camera" - yeah well then why would they bother changing their public relationship definition then? There's nothing to gain. Apart from the frenzied attention any 'coming outs' attract, which is not at all the kind of attention they seem like they'd be comfortable with.

Freedom I suppose. If they are in a relationship, they probably have to cut stuff out and not do certain things in public. Basically, they could act like a normal couple.

i completely understand that this is an argument that can hold up for closeted couples in general, but i don't think it necessarily holds up for couples who are famous in any way. if deppy are a couple, they can't do any sort of pda as of now for the risk of being spotted and pictures of it ending up on the internet forever. if they came out as a couple, people would still spot them in public and put creepshots of them holding hands on the internet. of course, there wouldn't be a collective outcry and #phanisreal trending on twitter each time, but i doubt it would cease to happen if we get random creepshots of them standing a meter apart on the bus as of now.
sure, no one but them can judge to what extent that would bother them, but in general, people would still be interested in their relationship -- and possibly in pda especially since their online content / behaviour towards each other would probably not change much. people would be interested in creepshots of them holding hands (as it'd be a novelty) just as much as in photos of them standing more than 30 cm apart from each other (phandivorce?). therefore, i doubt that coming out as a couple would definitely be as liberating as it's sometimes painted.

edit: also, what fancybum said

[Afunnyworld]

Genuine question: what in the world would they gain from making their relationship public (in an overt "ok here's the truth internet" way rather than "we're existing as we are, make of it what you will" way- the overt one for some reason being the focus of people's theories lately)? I know people just want to Know, but what exactly gives off the impression that D&P themselves want to open that door to the entire flipping internet after years of very plainly saying that's not what they want their content to focus on in any way? "Well they'll still make the same content and act the same on camera" - yeah well then why would they bother changing their public relationship definition then? There's nothing to gain. Apart from the frenzied attention any 'coming outs' attract, which is not at all the kind of attention they seem like they'd be comfortable with.

I think that making their relationship public would ease any anxiety they might have surrounding it. In Phil's liveshow last week he mentioned having dreams the night before the Edinburgh panel, (at 10:00) where he was waking up every hour from stress dreams about the panel. When he said that the first thing that I thought was; they are both probably very nervous that people will bring up their relationship at these type of things. Especially since it has happened before (geek week with Chris, and that time when they were at that party and Dan said he doesn't think people should film at parties...). I'm not sure if it would be worth it since there are probably several downsides to a public relationship, but I do think that it would mean that they would save a lot of energy from worry or anxiety at any public event that their relationship might be brought up (and if that is actually a thing that I didn't just imagine, then it would be a pretty big gain imo)

[bee]

Genuine question: what in the world would they gain from making their relationship public (in an overt "ok here's the truth internet" way rather than "we're existing as we are, make of it what you will" way- the overt one for some reason being the focus of people's theories lately)? I know people just want to Know, but what exactly gives off the impression that D&P themselves want to open that door to the entire flipping internet after years of very plainly saying that's not what they want their content to focus on in any way? "Well they'll still make the same content and act the same on camera" - yeah well then why would they bother changing their public relationship definition then? There's nothing to gain. Apart from the frenzied attention any 'coming outs' attract, which is not at all the kind of attention they seem like they'd be comfortable with.

I think that making their relationship public would ease any anxiety they might have surrounding it. In Phil's liveshow last week he mentioned having dreams the night before the Edinburgh panel, (at 10:00) where he was waking up every hour from stress dreams about the panel. When he said that the first thing that I thought was; they are both probably very nervous that people will bring up their relationship at these type of things. Especially since it has happened before (geek week with Chris, and that time when they were at that party and Dan said he doesn't think people should film at parties...). I'm not sure if it would be worth it since there are probably several downsides to a public relationship, but I do think that it would mean that they would save a lot of energy from worry or anxiety at any public event that their relationship might be brought up (and if that is actually a thing that I didn't just imagine, then it would be a pretty big gain imo)

I understand this and maybe this would be a big thing for them, but I also feel like being completely comfortable in the public eye isn't really something that's possible. I was thinking there's probably more about them that they don't want outlined or bombarded with in interviews or whatever (that's about something else, not their relationship).
There's probably anxiety inherent to being in the public eye (at least the people I know), people being in your business all the time, having people semi or full-out stalk you and invade your privacy literally all the time, like the creepshots lurker mentioned, how big is their relationship status in the scope of all that? We don't know that, but it's also really possible it isn't in the whole big picture. Having something private (especially a relationship, but that's maybe also me, there's also something comfortable for me not being out with a partner to everyone) can also be freeing. Being out would also not be comfortable because then still people'd want to know more (and would feel entitled to more), or put them on the spot, or have Opinions about how they should act and be with each other. Not even mentioned all the sexuality and gender mess this world is that they'd have to deal with in a whole new and bigger way.

[edit] I'm thinking I've basically said what was already said by multiple people, errrr, anyway, ahem, don't mind me

[archived]

@everyone who replied to me

I get where you are coming from but I still feel like confirming a relationship, while I agree it wouldn't change much, the results would still be more positive than negative. Also, I'm sorry I didn't make it clear but I actually was more focused on the whole settling down bit, i think that is the more important reason they would confirm the relationship.

[bee]

@everyone who replied to me

I get where you are coming from but I still feel like confirming a relationship, while I agree it wouldn't change much, the results would still be more positive than negative. Also, I'm sorry I didn't make it clear but I actually was more focused on the whole settling down bit, i think that is the more important reason they would confirm the relationship.

nah settling down is overrated

I mean, society tells us you should want that, but, not everyone wants that (needs that/is able to do that)

(Could be that's them what do I know, nothing lol, sometimes the absurdity of theorizing about people I don't know online with people I don't know overcomes me, ever happen to anybody here? anyway. I feel silly now and are going to attempt to watch backup deppy Sims because I've not even seen the alien abduction yet)

[alch]

@everyone who replied to me

I get where you are coming from but I still feel like confirming a relationship, while I agree it wouldn't change much, the results would still be more positive than negative. Also, I'm sorry I didn't make it clear but I actually was more focused on the whole settling down bit, i think that is the more important reason they would confirm the relationship.

The average age of marriage in the UK for men is about 36 and a half, and rising, according to a study done in 2013. Not that this would definitely be them, but I'm just saying a lot of people in the UK seem to settle down at an older age than they are now.
Also, I think confirming a relationship for them would cause even more invasions of privacy than have already occurred, which is even now probably a huge source of anxiety in their lives. It would just make their fanbase even more rabid.

[sparkle]

Firstly, I would like to clarify that I don't think they'll use PINOF as a coming out, but I could see them leaving in something subtle, I'm just really looking forward to PINOF and normally I'm not a big fan tbh. I also completely understand the 'you're looking too hard' but thats also half the fun of speculating.

What I do think is missing from Moving 2.0 is that if they do move, that tells us something about their relationship that has henceforth been somewhat deniable - we know they're going to move again, and at that point I think if they still live together.... like archived said, thats why I think they'd confirm for sure (either way).

Something I wanna throw into the "agenda to come out" discussion - this is just a feeling and probably amplified by confirmation bias, but to me it seems like Dan is more comfortable with the new agenda than Phil.

It was Dan who showed the moonroom, it was Phil who stuck with the Sleepless Night plan. It was Dan who mentioned foreverhome, who talked about #thatweekinmarch, but it was Phil who seemed uncomfortable telling the leg bruise story. It was also Dan who admitted to "planting seeds", but then there's Phil with his "we are not moving" LS camera angle.

I am not sure what this means, maybe mastermind sparkle can make something of it. It was just something that stood out to me after I saw the bruise discussion on the gaming LS and then reconsidered the last months.

Disclaimer: I am only talking about their online personas, so this has nothing to do with their actual relationship but rather the display of it.

I have been summoned

My opinion on this would've been different even a few days ago, I can't remember who started it but the discussion of voldy from Phil's perspective has really changed how I view Phil.

Firstly, because they put everything out there themselves there is nothing they don't want us to see. We don't know a whole lot about them, as neither of them are daily vloggers. The last video discussing Phil's life was the moving video and if you want to exclude that, the last time he talked about his actual recent life was 5 months ago (Why I Can't Go Back To The Gym), and that was only an anecdote. The last video Dan talked about his life was the Bahamas video 3 months ago, but excluding that as an extraordinary case of the universe hating him and something that probably needed explaining, and excluding the piano teacher video (6 months ago) because it was kid Dan. The last time Dan talked about his life was I Nearly Blinded Myself - a whopping 11 months ago. And these are only snippets - nothing about their actual day to day lives etc. So don't think for one second that what they've put online isn't agreed upon and done by consensus - because they don't actually put a whole lot online, which is very clever when you think about it. (And HEALTHY, they have a very private life when you actually think about it, which is incredible - I don't think for a second they dont know exactly what they are doing) So Phil is onboard with whatever they're doing.

Now just solely talking about AmazingPhil and danisnotonfire - I think ever since the v-day video, Dan has been the one to push things and I think this is because he is more comfortable with that role than Phil. Phil brands himself as nothing but happy and kind, he is consistent and stubborn, he is changing but its slow. AmazingPhil doesnt want to share too much because he wants to make you happy, not have you turn up at his front door, but when he is changing it is to more adult content (a fucking jizz joke omg) and not to more open content.

Dan is pushing the openness more than Phil tbh. Like I said, Dan is more open than Phil ever since the v-day video, and I think that could be because Dan Howell can deal with criticism easier than Phil Lester can, I think Dan can show vulnerability easier than Phil can. I think Dan is the one to be 'pushing' it because I think Dan can just deal with it better, its easier to delegate to somebody who has a reputation for that. I think Dan is pushing it more because it would be a BIG DEAL for Phil to stream from Dans room, whereas Dan doing it makes more sense. Dan could be planting seeds, but they aren't being ignored by Phil. Phil wanted them planted too, its just Dan is better at it.

But then why does it seem like Dan is pushing and pushing and Phil is holding back? View them as a duo and you see that its not actually true, they are both pushing, Dan is just the public face of it. Phil is changing too. But I see Phil as reminding us that they are in control, Dan can be intimate and show his bedroom with Phil's shoes in there, and Phil reminds us that he has a separate bedroom. It is agreed upon by them what they do and do not show. I think they are both as comfortable, I just think they are asserting their control differently.

Viewing them as united helps in seeing their new openness, if Phil really was on the upstairs computer when Dan was going to livestream and Phil wasn't okay with him doing it in his bedroom, Phil would have moved. Phil was also okay with it. Everything they show us is mediated and everything they show us, they are okay with.

[aleanna]

Genuine question: what in the world would they gain from making their relationship public (in an overt "ok here's the truth internet" way rather than "we're existing as we are, make of it what you will" way- the overt one for some reason being the focus of people's theories lately)? I know people just want to Know, but what exactly gives off the impression that D&P themselves want to open that door to the entire flipping internet after years of very plainly saying that's not what they want their content to focus on in any way? "Well they'll still make the same content and act the same on camera" - yeah well then why would they bother changing their public relationship definition then? There's nothing to gain. Apart from the frenzied attention any 'coming outs' attract, which is not at all the kind of attention they seem like they'd be comfortable with.

I think that making their relationship public would ease any anxiety they might have surrounding it. In Phil's liveshow last week he mentioned having dreams the night before the Edinburgh panel, (at 10:00) where he was waking up every hour from stress dreams about the panel. When he said that the first thing that I thought was; they are both probably very nervous that people will bring up their relationship at these type of things. Especially since it has happened before (geek week with Chris, and that time when they were at that party and Dan said he doesn't think people should film at parties...). I'm not sure if it would be worth it since there are probably several downsides to a public relationship, but I do think that it would mean that they would save a lot of energy from worry or anxiety at any public event that their relationship might be brought up (and if that is actually a thing that I didn't just imagine, then it would be a pretty big gain imo)

I agree with this. Also, they wouldn't have to stress quite as much about what things might seems "too couple-y to keep in a video. I don't think they'd indulge in overt PDA, but there's probably little looks and touches that they feel the need to edit out now that they wouldn't have to after.

Also, I think people are misinterpreting a what sparkle said just a bit. She doesn't literally think that they'll make a statement confirming a romantic relationship, just that whenever they finally move into their forever home (which they've actually said they plan to do), the implication is that they are together. How many best friends buy a house or forever home together? I'm sure it happens, but more often, that's a thing that couples do...

[mintsans]

I just want the "they're moving to their forever home" theory to be true cause I want to judge them on their interior design choices to be honest.

I'm so curious about what kind of posh bs they'll do to a house once there's no landlord to tell them they can't!!!!! (Also pets!!!! Let Phil have his hamster and corgi!!!!)

[sparkle]

Also, I think people are misinterpreting a what sparkle said just a bit. She doesn't literally think that they'll make a statement confirming a romantic relationship, just that whenever they finally move into their forever home (which they've actually said they plan to do), the implication is that they are together. How many best friends buy a house or forever home together? I'm sure it happens, but more often, that's a thing that couples do...

Yep that degree of permanency makes it hard to refute tbh

Getting rid of my 'conspiracy theory' persona, I genuinely, I never think there'll be a statement, just increased subtext and I think there is going to be a lot of this going towards the end of the year - PINOF 9. I'm telling you, that will be interesting.

[fancybum]

Also, I think people are misinterpreting a what sparkle said just a bit. She doesn't literally think that they'll make a statement confirming a romantic relationship, just that whenever they finally move into their forever home (which they've actually said they plan to do), the implication is that they are together. How many best friends buy a house or forever home together? I'm sure it happens, but more often, that's a thing that couples do...

(My issue was with the weirdly victim-blamey vibe of saying that they want the uncomfortable attention they get ('who sleeps where? they want us to know') and are lowkey asking for it while actually doing the opposite, I don't think there was much misinterpretation with that- the question of 'what would they gain' was more of a tangent)

[alittledizzy]

Even if you assume that coming out would take one kind of pressure off them, it would invite an even darker kind of scrutiny. Instead of "omg did you see that, did you see how dan looked at him, it totally means they're together" it would be "oh my god did you see that, did you see how dan talked to them, I think they're breaking up."

And the only think I can imagine more stressful than people speculating on your relationship existing is people speculating on your relationship ending.

[relatablemood]

Hm. Maybe they'll never come out. And just thinking about it now... the thought doesn't bother me. I mean, it shouldn't bother anyone in any other way than a come-on-prove-me-right kinda thing. But like, I think we've all been waiting for so long that if they come out it'd never meet our expectations, you know. They'd still be private people. They wouldn't laugh and joke in a "we're married" video. If anything, we'd long for the time that we all pointed out what kind of flooring they had and what videos were edited by who.

Or maybe I'm just having a depressive episode again (tends to calm me down, in the beginning)

[sugar]

i am ALWAYS late to every discussion. i guess i should be pleased that i've got a full time job and social life these days?

Sims: i know i'm somewhat alone but i still adore the sims series. i'm always excited for more of it. their sims series is what really got me into them. i still think tabitha gets abducted is one of the funniest videos they've ever made. unless they've got aging turned off or slowed, dil should be aging up into an elder any episode now, which i don't really mind. now that they've got dab and dalien (and evan, in a roundabout way) i don't really see dil's death as the end of the series. if dalien was planned (which i believe he was) i think that's the perfect way to keep people interested in the series beyond dil.


AmazingSlime: i LOVED this video. watched it when i got home from the fair last night and i was pretty intoxicated so when i woke up this morning i was sure i had imagined how...not exactly PG some of his comments were. i rewatched as soon as i woke up and i was so pleasantly surprised that it wasn't just a dream. the video was so, so enjoyable and definitely one of my favorite AP videos. i'm really here for anything where they just drop their personas and seem to be having a good time. the comments on drugs and unicorn bodily fluids seemed...a bit out of character for his innocent PG AP persona, which i know has been mentioned. but what i find most interesting is that this comes in as his first video since the talk with sue perkins, in which he said that he's "quite a PG channel'. i'm just curious about this and find it interesting that he said that so explicitly and then went on to make a video that...might contradict that in a way. on another hand i wonder if this was just his way of contracting the inherently "childish" nature of a slime video. i wonder if maybe it was deliberate to include those things to make it clear that he is still a 30 year old man, regardless of his content. anyone else have any thoughts or insight on this?

and as for the current discussion, i'll just say that there are plenty of reasons for them to keep their relationship a secret that extend well beyond the prevalence of homophobia that still exists. it would be like beating a dead horse at this point for me to list the reasons off.

i believe someone said that if they were really in secret relationship for this long, they wouldn't be able to keep it up. which i'd like to argue. the only unfiltered deppy content we get are the occasional joint liveshow, and any public apperarances in which they aren't performing something scripted. and now the gaming streams. everything else can be edited to show us only what they want us to see. having to filter yourself that infrequently really isn't that hard. i dated my manager at work once which wasn't allowed. we both could have been fired. i was spending nearly eery night at his house and yet we went into work and aside fromt he occasional comment from people saying we flirted with each other, no one was any the wiser. dan and phil are pretty much in the same situation in regards to that. what i'm trying to say is, they're not animals. they can handle not having their hands all over each other for 45 minutes at a time. especially now, as they're certainly no longer in the honeymoon phase of their relationship. they're used to each other. the fact that they haven't been caught at any point doing anything particularly damning really says nothing to me.

[alch]

Even if you assume that coming out would take one kind of pressure off them, it would invite an even darker kind of scrutiny. Instead of "omg did you see that, did you see how dan looked at him, it totally means they're together" it would be "oh my god did you see that, did you see how dan talked to them, I think they're breaking up."

And the only think I can imagine more stressful than people speculating on your relationship existing is people speculating on your relationship ending.

I hadn't thought about that kind of scrutiny, good point! That would probably be worse than what they have now.

[sparkle]

Also, I think people are misinterpreting a what sparkle said just a bit. She doesn't literally think that they'll make a statement confirming a romantic relationship, just that whenever they finally move into their forever home (which they've actually said they plan to do), the implication is that they are together. How many best friends buy a house or forever home together? I'm sure it happens, but more often, that's a thing that couples do...

(My issue was with the weirdly victim-blamey vibe of saying that they want the uncomfortable attention they get ('who sleeps where? they want us to know') and are lowkey asking for it while actually doing the opposite, I don't think there was much misinterpretation with that- the question of 'what would they gain' was more of a tangent)

does it help if I clarify I didnt mean it like that? Even though I can see how it comes across and now I'm genuinely embarrassed about it . I guess I meant more like they are trying to hint that something is coming but they have control over how and when we find out. We can theorise all we want, they can show us the moon room but then they can show us Phil in his room and it lets us know that they have control. They want us to pick up on it, but they also want to remain firmly in control of it. Thats literally no better fml brb deleting myself off the internet lol I feel so stupid

[relatablemood]

Pssst I love you sparkle

[pastelspectre]

hop me on the relationship theory train sparkle said omg.

[sparkle]

Pssst I love you sparkle

(also btw loved your questions in the last thread )

hop me on the relationship theory train sparkle said omg.

thank you I think i'm more preoccupied by what another move means than are they moving, and i'm glad other people can see it too. And I think its interesting to see them as bracing for the connotations of that.

Though I do think the big, big advantage of hiding your relationship is you don't end up in the awkward 'we broke up' situation that Emma and Luke had. (also can you imagine if either Dan or Phil did what Luke did and 'came out as straight' not saying it would happen ever but just imagine the reaction)

[apathy]

AmazingSlime: i LOVED this video. watched it when i got home from the fair last night and i was pretty intoxicated so when i woke up this morning i was sure i had imagined how...not exactly PG some of his comments were. i rewatched as soon as i woke up and i was so pleasantly surprised that it wasn't just a dream. the video was so, so enjoyable and definitely one of my favorite AP videos. i'm really here for anything where they just drop their personas and seem to be having a good time. the comments on drugs and unicorn bodily fluids seemed...a bit out of character for his innocent PG AP persona, which i know has been mentioned. but what i find most interesting is that this comes in as his first video since the talk with sue perkins, in which he said that he's "quite a PG channel'. i'm just curious about this and find it interesting that he said that so explicitly and then went on to make a video that...might contradict that in a way. on another hand i wonder if this was just his way of contracting the inherently "childish" nature of a slime video. i wonder if maybe it was deliberate to include those things to make it clear that he is still a 30 year old man, regardless of his content. anyone else have any thoughts or insight on this?

For the unicorn thing: a child's first thought would probably be poop/pee, which is pretty PG considering he just mentioned glittery poop shortly before anyway. And he did say "bodily function", not fluid. (Actually "does he mean poop?" was my first thought, but I'm not a very sexually minded person. ) It's the type of humor that you can miss when you're young.

Less so with the drugs, that seemed more out of place with it being straightforward and not just a "this looks a bit suspicious" and moving on. But not that bad I don't think? Probably still fits the PG13 rating. I'm not a parent though, or an expert on rating systems.