Dan & Phil Part 98: forever home!!1!!!

[oblongdisposition]

So apparently adrian’s girlfriend was a phannie artist on tumblr...

[starsandshards]

... blinking white guy meme

[Levitating]

So apparently adrian’s girlfriend was a phannie artist on tumblr...

Don't leave us like this!

Meanwhile, I have just discovered Phan Fiction (late to the game, I know) and, oh my, guys, they can be so fluffy and cuddling

[oblongdisposition]

Idk if I should post links... she’s deleted most things from her blog anyway. Her art was very innocent. She started watching them in 2009 and she met Dan as a fan several years ago.

[lefthandedism]

Moderator Post

Discussing publicly available information about individuals on the forum is fine. While the main threads are about Dan and Phil, there are many side threads for additional discussion. Adrian has his own thread in the Other YouTubers subforum, so feel free to continue the conversation there. At all times, you can refer to the the forum rules if you have any questions about what is appropriate to post, or please ask me or any of the mods.

[alittledizzy]

AW PHIL! And he donated £340, that's so cute! It pushed us over £4000 total.

[Megancita75]

Anyone run across a post somewhere from someone who could access/read the Swedish newspaper that Cornelia & Martyn were featured in and that she posted about in her Instastories? The headline is something about "miracle baby" and I'm curious is she is sharing more about her pregnancy and birth story.

[kavat]

Anyone run across a post somewhere from someone who could access/read the Swedish newspaper that Cornelia & Martyn were featured in and that she posted about in her Instastories? The headline is something about "miracle baby" and I'm curious is she is sharing more about her pregnancy and birth story.

Oooh interesting! I found the newspaper, I'm going to try and translate it.

[kavat]

The Golden Family "Our Freja is a miracle" [paywall]

Cornelia Dahlgren and Martyn Lester, London, had a daughter named Freja on December 1st. Weight 3410 g, length 50 cm. Cornelia grew up on Öland.


The Golden Family.
“Our Freja is a miracle ”

Musician, actor and artist.
The Öland "Idol" participant has finally got her dream role, she has become a mother.
- Our Freja is a miracle, says Cornelia Dahlgren.

LONDON / ÖLAND
How is Freja?
- She is fine. The labor started a little too early, she was scheduled for December 11 but the labour started on November 30. At the hospital, it turned out that she was not positioned quite right. After a day and a half in hospital, we had to make a decision about a caesarean section. When she came out she was very quiet but now we know that she has fully developed lung capacity, haha!

Describe her, how is she as a person?
- Very stubborn and very happy. She is direct and straightforward. Though probably all babies are. But it's never hard to understand what she wants. She has started to smile now and we can see what she's in the mood for.

Freja is your first child, what is it like to become a parent?
- Wonderful. It has been such a long journey with miscarriages and anxiety and then a pandemic on top. Our Freja is a miracle.

That sounds tough, do you want to tell me?
- Yes, I have realized that it is important to talk about miscarriage. For our part, there were several factors that came into play. After several miscarriages and examinations, we received help with IVF. At the end of 2019, the treatment started with injections and medicines, it was a struggle. At the beginning of last year, the actual in vitro fertilization was performed. But it didn’t work out. We had a new time booked when covid struck. It was cancelled and we were not allowed to make any more attempts. It was hard and we were very, very sad.

Hm. But now you have Freja, how did that happen?
- We tried in a natural way and Freja came into being. She really is our miracle baby, in just about every way. But there was a lot of anxiety during the pregnancy. Martyn was only allowed to attend one ultrasound, on the other occasions he had to wait outside on the sidewalk due to covid. But we have received incredibly good support from doctors and midwives, the National Health Service, NHS, has been there for us and we are very grateful.

Did you know it was going to be a girl?
- Yes, but we decided to keep it private. Early in the pregnancy, we did a harmony test, a blood test where you look for the baby's DNA in the mother's blood to see if everything looked good. It did and we were told at the same time that it was a girl.

Was it easy to come up with the name?
- We actually had time to talk about boy names before we got to know the gender and the name that was at the top of the top list was Leif. My dad's name is Leif and we were into Nordic mythology and history and also thought of Leif Eriksson. We came to Freja when Martyn said that he liked the name Gaia, the goddess of the earth and fertility in Greek mythology. We have no biological or historical roots in that mythology, but the idea was nice and then I thought of Freja of Nordic mythology. Freja represents love and fertility for us and when she was born the name was so right.

Does she have any more names?
- Yes, she has a lot of names, haha! Her name is Freja Dorothy Gunnel Dahlgren Lester. Dorothy is after Martyn's grandmother who he has always described as a fantastic person, and Gunnel is after my grandmother. Neither Dorothy nor Gunnel are alive anymore, but it felt natural to choose their name. The funny thing is that Freja has the same hair color as my grandmother and me.

What about baptism?
- The idea is, depending on how everything develops with the pandemic, that we will be able to have baptism on Öland in July. I have been on Öland every summer since I was four years old and when I was ten we moved there, I see Öland as my home.

Is Freja a British citizen?
- We are applying for a British passport and later we will apply for a Swedish passport. We might try to see if she can have dual citizenship later on. The plan is also for her to become bilingual so that she can speak to all Swedish and English relatives and therefore I only speak Swedish with her.

If you search for Cornelia Dahlgren in Barometern-OT's archive, you get lots of hits, you have been in the band Popshop and ”Idol” in 2004, you have been on the stage of Dramaten and everything. How did you end up in London?
- I was at Red Bull Music Academy's bootcamp in Barcelona in 2008 and got to know some British musicians who invited me to London. I thought I would try to live there for a year and well, I met Martyn through the music, we started talking and got to know each other. Although it took me a while to get that he was interested in that way, haha!

How does it work with parental leave in the UK?
- Not so great. You have two months with full pay, then it drops significantly. And if you look further ahead, when it's time for childcare, well then it's tempting to move back to Sweden. But Martyn is self-employed and would have a hard time moving. In London, it is difficult to get a preschool place, the prices are so high, it is cheaper with daycare. Then you can have a nanny but it is not for people with regular incomes.

What do you do?
- I started as an event manager in my partner's company, IRL Digital Ltd, and am now a brand manager and work with marketing, entertainment and merchandise that is not just fast fashion.

What do you miss from Sweden?
- It’s been over ten years since I lived in Sweden but I miss the cleanliness, nature and the right of public access. I also miss the good tap water. And my family of course, my sister and her family in Stockholm and my mother and her husband, and my father and his wife who all live on Öland.

What are you looking forward to?
- Oh, that's so much! I look forward to playing and singing with Freja, that she will share Martyn's interest in skateboarding. But, and this sounds so cheesy, that little piece that was missing in my life has finally fallen into place. Becoming a parent means not prioritizing yourself first. I look forward to meeting myself as Freja's mother. Of course I want to see Freja grow up and get to know her, but I have not allowed or dared to think of myself as a mother and I look forward to meeting myself.

Anna Mi Matzén

[Levitating]

omg, she is a miracle ;_;

Cornelia is the best for talking about miscarriage and IVF. I of course read the article looking for DnP things to infer, and my first thought was: if they ever decide to have children on their own, this testimony helps normalise how children can be conceived outside of "traditional" manners.

And thank you so much for translating this!

[kavat]

Such an iconic move to announce the pregnancy three days after the baby was born.

[rizzo]

Thank you for sharing, kavat!! That article made my heart feel so full. I just want to give her and Martyn big hugs tbh.

Such an iconic move to announce the pregnancy three days after the baby was born.

Holy shit I didn't even realize! She really did spread out all of her pregnancy content through December. A QUEEN!!

[Levitating]

I am actually getting confused. She was publishing getting-ready-for-the-baby posts up to the 21st of December?
I completely understand their desire to announce it after the birth and do not care about social media in the midst of welcoming a baby, but still don't understand why to pretend it hadn't happened yet?
I am not entitled to anyone's life and do not have any word on what amount of information they desire to share, but I think I expect people to be at least sincere... anywhere?
Of course, it's her job now, but still. It should be clear that it is fiction or it is the same as unfounded publications of British tabloids.

[mitsleo]

I think it's completely understandable why they would have waited till the baby was delivered to announce the news. As she explained they had such a hard time conceiving and as a person who has seen people going through the draining process of conceiving for so long, turning to IVF and not getting results, the scare of something happening even after the baby is born is so prominent. They are calling it their miracle baby, so it's completely fine that they first come to terms with it themselves before telling the world about it.
Also, I think the reason for not telling was a combination of coming to terms with it as well as documenting it for themselves, now they were sure everything is fine.

[rizzo]

I am actually getting confused. She was publishing getting-ready-for-the-baby posts up to the 21st of December?
I completely understand their desire to announce it after the birth and do not care about social media in the midst of welcoming a baby, but still don't understand why to pretend it hadn't happened yet?
I am not entitled to anyone's life and do not have any word on what amount of information they desire to share, but I think I expect people to be at least sincere... anywhere?
Of course, it's her job now, but still. It should be clear that it is fiction or it is the same as unfounded publications of British tabloids.

Given that she recently signed with ATF, I think it's safe to assume Cornelia's looking to be a mommy blogger or at least influencer of some kind (perhaps through her music as well). So I think it's totally understandable that she lined up posts about pregnancy/preparing for birth, but was hesitant to post them until Freja had safely made her way into the world. I think the article makes it evident why she may have wanted to hold off announcing anything until she had given birth.

Honestly, the content's really beautiful and sweet, so I don't really mind when she chose to post it. If delayed posting made her feel more comfortable, then all the better for it!

And I'm sure delayed posting isn't a new concept to her, given those in-laws she's got....

[Megancita75]

Yeah, I don't think the posts themselves necessarily implied they were current. I certainly suspected they were delayed by quite a bit when she was posting them, just based on all the moms I know in real life who have had experiences with miscarriage and are super cautious about when they announce a pregnancy, and I can see how that experience would translate to some caution about making sure the baby was born healthy before starting social media posts. It's maybe a tiny bit disingenuous, but not in a way that bothers me.

[missemma]

Such an iconic move to announce the pregnancy three days after the baby was born.

Thank you so much for translating that, it is such an interesting read. I’m so happy for them, they’re such a lovely couple they deserve all the happiness.

I’m also glad they announced it later, they got to spend the first bit without the stress of people knowing and asking a lot. Good on them

[Secretstanner]

Not surprised the posts were delayed. I’ve had years to get use to DnP doing the same. Anytime they post or say they went somewhere I’m like “okay so this was 4-5 days ago?” I just didn’t know it was almost a month after she was born they announced the baby. But as she said in that interview that she’s had miscarriages. We have no idea how far into those pregnancies she was. Including her age you are told about higher risks. Do I think posting “almost time” on a picture is a bit disingenuous? Maybe but knowing the babies birthday changes nothing. I’m just happy they have their perfect little family.

[shan]

Good on them for announcing it in their own time. Martyn said in his stereo that they wanted to be in the moment and for them that was obviously for the entire journey. Unfortunately, the older you get, the higher the risk of complications during the actual birth and the potential for the baby to require assistance after birth. With them being put in the lime light from all the Uncle Phil excitement, it makes sense to take care of themselves and their beautiful miracle baby first. Lovely article!

[lefthandedism]

Good on them for announcing it in their own time. Martyn said in his stereo....

Ah, this explains why Martyn was actually available for the stereo. I did have a bit of side-eye on him doing it on the day of the baby's birth, but that didn't in fact happen, so all good. I wonder if the stereo show was part of the calculation for the timing of their announcement. Good way to go public!

And that was a lovely article!

[plinthofmylife]

I'm really proud of them, actually, for delaying it, there is 0 reason I expect them to feel an obligation to keep people updated ~~up to the minute~~ on their own personal lives. But delaying takes some serious work, and I'm sure it was a good call to make.. Also I've loved the quality of the content - just the beautifulness of the photographs that cornelia has been posting!

Anyway, thank you for the translation @kavat!

Infertility + miscarriage are really not talked about enough, so I'm glad to see Cornelia speak about it.

The American in me is laughing at Cornelia saying that the UK's 2 months of paid leave is "really bad"

[liola]

The American in me is laughing at Cornelia saying that the UK's 2 months of paid leave is "really bad"

I understand the point of view but it IS really bad, the standard for EU is a minimum of 16 weeks so that's half of it (and most countries are even longer)

That article is so sweet. I have a friend who just got pregnant after more than a year of IVF trials and I've witnessed how hard it feels and I'm so happy for them that they had their miracle baby.

Makes me think about all of those times phandom (and I put myself in the mix) thought they were childfree by strong choice. Maybe they changed their minds or maybe it was just timing, who knows, I'm glad it worked out in the best way for them

[kavat]

The American in me is laughing at Cornelia saying that the UK's 2 months of paid leave is "really bad"

Kinda ot but

In Sweden you get (if I'm remembering correctly) 16 months per child for the parents to share, of which 3 months has to be taken out by the non birthing parent. The leave can be used up to the child turns 12, so some use parental leave to work part time for a while before going back full time.

It's not full pay, I think it's 70-80% but yeah, 2 months is nothing. Like is your body even remotely recovered at that point? And where are you leaving a 2 month old baby that is probably still breastfed?!

[shan]

Not really relevant to anything but I saw Phil's hometown in the news for hosting super wholesome goat zoom calls

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-lancashire-55887368

[madzilla84]

Not really relevant to anything but I saw Phil's hometown in the news for hosting super wholesome goat zoom calls

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-lancashire-55887368

I remember this from the first lockdown last year! This would definitely be a strong contender for news story of the weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek if liveshows were still a thing