papierklemmen wrote:re: holding hands, i always think of jimmy0010 who said that even now after his coming out he never holds hands with his bf in public bc they don't feel safe (it was a video on "being gay in 2016" and that while it seems that we've progressed a lot, homophobia is still rampant). so one thing that def wouldn't surprise me is a lack of holding hands pics.
Yeah, I think the lgbt+ aspect of their (potential) relationship plays into all of it. Progress is happening really rapidly in a lot of places, and it's easy to forget that just 10-15 years ago 'same-sex' (ahhh the gender binary, not straight?) couples needed to be more careful. They were growing up when offhand homophobic comments still went unquestioned by the majority of British/American society, and that has an impact on you, regardless of where we are today as a society. Plus, as above, homophobia/biphobia is still very much a thing, even if it tends to be more subtle. Even as much as someone who wouldn't label themselves as a homophobe, but would frown at/admonish a couple for holding hands/displaying minimal PDA in front of children can suck, and teach people to be wary of PDA. Farther along the spectrum, one of my friends had balloons filled with sand thrown at her and her girlfriend in a very liberal town in New England in 2014. I've never experienced anything like that, but I still think about it every time I hold my girlfriend's hand in public. It's just one of those things that non-straight/cis people think about more, and even if they never had to hide a relationship from non-internet people, would give them a leg up in being more conscious of how they're acting towards each other and how people are reading them.
Also aside from some of their 'friends' being super shady on twitter in the past, I think the fact that revealing their relationship would not just being going against Youtube insider norms, but
outing them, plays a role. Most people I know in the lgbt+ community respect the number one golden rule, don't ever out anyone ever, and I think most straight people respect that too these days. If common decency fails, there's the fan/community reaction to fear. Someone revealing their relationship would not only get the wrath of those angry about invasion of their privacy, they would get attacked for outing them (rightfully so).
Plus, we can never forget the phan denial number one ally, heternormativity. Whether they like it or not, whether their dating or not, they're given a lot more credit than a guy and a girl in the same position would be given.
)
Poor Phil didn't want to be left behind by Dan. 
