Dan & Phil Part 24: I got moist for you, Phil

[fancybum]

@Lurktacularr and fancybum: If a group of people want to play a game and they make it boys vs girls (however they personally identify themself is up to them), is that still considered a gender roles thing?

Ok this is kind of getting real weird and off-topic but in the completely contextless scenario you've provided: No. Add a bit of context and who knows. If the context is just: need two teams, let's do boys vs girls for the sake of simplicity, then who cares. The societal expectations (and pressure in cases like Lurktacularr explained) when it comes to following 'traditions' muddies the waters of what a person wants to do and what a person is pressured to do, based on nothing more than their gender, then yes, shit gets weird. What's the issue I'm missing here.

[Lurktacularr]

edit blueapple_x no I know nobody's calling him problematic here - my point was he gets called problematic one day and then gets accused of overkill the next. Re your 'teams' example, not particularly since presumably they're not being split based on a presumed judgement over them only being friends with the same gender, and would presumably not be undertaking different activities based on their gender, but that example was a little vague to really give a proper answer

edit 2 - this may be a double post cos i fucked up my editing its late I'm tired SORREH

[bluewho]

Wedding video notes and timestamps.

00:00 "Hello Dan and Phil Games wedding guests."

oh that's just me, falling into the phan trashcan at 00:01

00:02 them sitting there in suits talking about weddings is already too much for my phan trash heart tbh

5:11 Summer Holiday is/isn't a ho for hitting on Dil before his wedding

8:55 If Dan, I mean Tabitha, uses her posture she can stay smaller than her life partner Phil, I mean Dil.

9:23 "As like a symbol of masculinity and business and stuff it's quite funny that it's just like a pointless piece of accessorizing cloth." Dan you commie

9:32 Ties are a symbol of masculinity, and they're "just boring" says Dan.

11:21 Dangerous for Tabitha to be around Eliza when she's feeling flirty, bisexuality exists etc

11:44 They didn't send an invite to the BP corporation because "that's the worst" BP because oil spill - Dan's a commie part 2

12:31 "The brotable". Do you think they just name everything in their house like this; the brotable, the brofa, the brookcase, the bromance, the brojobs

12:36 They both read out 'take a slice together' together, at the same time, in the same tone

12:48 Summer and Zion are "Cheesy Bitches". Zion's a guy so this must be just something Dan says now regardless of the gender of the person he's talking to? Did he do this deliberately to subvert the assumption that 'bitch' is a term you can apply to women only?

13:38 "Aww so Dil's having his brotime, she's having her girltime, Dan and Phil have not done anything to smash gender roles, this is a great video..." . There are a few references like this - but I don't understand what is so stereotypical about going out with friends before your wedding? Like what gender roles are there to smash Dan?

13:55 Dan thinks the funny story Tabitha would tell about Dil would involve Dil saying "marriage that's like a ball and chain, fuck that" - because you know Dil, he wouldn't commit to anything, not even a shade of nail.

15:13 "Remember, we're progressive Phil."

16:34 'we're', 'we', 'our', 'us', 'our life story', 'we'...

17:10 Travis can come because he has blond hair (?)

17:52 'we' want a wedding in the park, cherry blossoms flowing

18:17 Dan, wearing a leather tie, expresses his concern that Dil will show up to his wedding wearing something leather. If that isn't projection tell me what is.

18:44 Phil being not such a cinnamon roll - he thinks 'Daddy's girl' is a 'weird thing to call' a wedding arch but the only way that's weird is if, ya know, you think that way. Lay off the porn Phil.

19:23 i just heard dan say 'we should get married now' all my dreams are alive

19:37 "Aw I feel so happy for them... everything's going so well". Now you know how the phandom feel watching you two sappy gits.

20:06 Blond Travis is thinking about Dil, bisexuality exists etc

20:20 we establish that Dan and Phil aren't ready for marriage.

20:22 wedding conveniently starts

rn:


21:05 huge jumpcut, insert chosen conspiracy theory here

21:28 D&P: 'This is basically just us living out our dreams'. me: 'just get married then you sappy gits' I'm so problematic, I'm just going to go and make some toast.

25:52 'The most fun I've ever had.' Over a microwave?! Are you kidding me?! If you are going to troll us at least do it properly and say this when they were going down the aisle or something, this is just lazy smh

26:43 'And now God doesn't hate them [when they have sex] because they are married, yay society.'

27:22 'Kids, achieving their dreams, mansions and death. That is life people.' This is the kind of cynical existential content I signed up for tbh.

[eevee]

so the expectation of them hanging out with sam-gender friends is gender roles? that's what I'm missing.

My Mac's dying and I should be asleep but I just wanted to say I totally get how Dan related the stag/hen do stuff to gender roles.

I, as a previously (lolz) engaged female found this really difficult and frankly I'm glad it never happened. It's SO gender-roley I don't get how its confused everyone.

Yes its also 'tradition' but the tradition is the woman goes out with her womanfriends to drink wine and dance and do 'girl things' and the man goes out with his manfriends to either bro it out over pizzas and beers or go to a strip joint. And what happened in this episode? Tabs went out with her womanfriend drinking wine and dancing. Dil bro'd it out with his manfriend over pizza. I can totally see why Dan felt like it was a bit grim and gender-rolly. It so happened to be the natural choice (as it so often is, hence tradition) so I also get why they went with is because really, what other option was there?

And I really am speaking from experience here. Many of my relatives and people who just didn't know me that well expected me to go out dancing with the girls and drink out of dick straws but in actuality more than half of my friends are male and I'd have rather gone paintballing tbh. I felt the gender-role pressure, so I can see where Dan is coming from 100%.

Times like this, I honestly think back to Dan's diss where he said people would say the way he makes toast is problematic. I don't understand how he's held to this perfect level of social awareness where even two casual mentions in a video are considered out of place and too much, despite being considered problematic for saying the word 'bitch' no less than 2 days ago. And yet Phil is left unaccountable for any of this shit because what, he just doesn't bother to address anything at all ever?

In that sense, would you rather Dan just shut up about it? I wouldn't. I like that he speaks his mind, even if sometimes it doesn't quite come out right, although I don't think this is one of those times. I got what he meant. And we all wonder where his crippling anxiety over his output comes from? He gets picked apart because he gives more and whilst I understand that (its more fodder, just like speculation over his sexuality) it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

You know I didn't really think that that post was directed right at me but now it is so I'm gonna respond to the one part that irked me:

it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

So it's okay to pick him apart for one word (saying bitch) for a page or so, but expressing confusion over something he said and saying maybe it was out of place is picking him apart and going too far? All of a sudden this forum isn't friendly anymore? I give up. Honestly I feel like I can't express an opinion in front of you, fancybum, because as soon as I do I feel like you come for me. If you have a personal problem with me, please bring to to DM, and hopefully we can work whatever it is out.

But maybe instead of dismissing Dan's thoughts because you don't get the link he's making, people could try to see where he's coming from instead of writing them off straight away.

I really don't think I "dismissed" his thoughts and instead asked the community here to explain it to me, which you did so thank you. I don't think I "wrote them off" either, I just thought it was a little strange the way he approached it and I suggested that maybe an easier way to go about it would be to say a clear disclaimer rather than a few quick comments that left a lot of us confused. If Dan is uncomfortable with something that's his right, who am I to tell him how to feel, but it was the lack of clarity I was criticizing. I'm sorry if you perceived it as me attacking Dan for his opinions but that's not at all what I meant to do. I don't feel negatively towards Dan for his opinion, he can have whatever opinions he feels are right.

[Lurktacularr]

so the expectation of them hanging out with sam-gender friends is gender roles? that's what I'm missing.

My Mac's dying and I should be asleep but I just wanted to say I totally get how Dan related the stag/hen do stuff to gender roles.

I, as a previously (lolz) engaged female found this really difficult and frankly I'm glad it never happened. It's SO gender-roley I don't get how its confused everyone.

Yes its also 'tradition' but the tradition is the woman goes out with her womanfriends to drink wine and dance and do 'girl things' and the man goes out with his manfriends to either bro it out over pizzas and beers or go to a strip joint. And what happened in this episode? Tabs went out with her womanfriend drinking wine and dancing. Dil bro'd it out with his manfriend over pizza. I can totally see why Dan felt like it was a bit grim and gender-rolly. It so happened to be the natural choice (as it so often is, hence tradition) so I also get why they went with is because really, what other option was there?

And I really am speaking from experience here. Many of my relatives and people who just didn't know me that well expected me to go out dancing with the girls and drink out of dick straws but in actuality more than half of my friends are male and I'd have rather gone paintballing tbh. I felt the gender-role pressure, so I can see where Dan is coming from 100%.

Times like this, I honestly think back to Dan's diss where he said people would say the way he makes toast is problematic. I don't understand how he's held to this perfect level of social awareness where even two casual mentions in a video are considered out of place and too much, despite being considered problematic for saying the word 'bitch' no less than 2 days ago. And yet Phil is left unaccountable for any of this shit because what, he just doesn't bother to address anything at all ever?

In that sense, would you rather Dan just shut up about it? I wouldn't. I like that he speaks his mind, even if sometimes it doesn't quite come out right, although I don't think this is one of those times. I got what he meant. And we all wonder where his crippling anxiety over his output comes from? He gets picked apart because he gives more and whilst I understand that (its more fodder, just like speculation over his sexuality) it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

You know I didn't really think that that post was directed right at me but now it is so I'm gonna respond to the one part that irked me:

it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

So it's okay to pick him apart for one word (saying bitch) for a page or so, but expressing confusion over something he said and saying maybe it was out of place is picking him apart and going too far? All of a sudden this forum isn't friendly anymore? I give up. Honestly I feel like I can't express an opinion in front of you, fancybum, because as soon as I do I feel like you come for me. If you have a personal problem with me, please bring to to DM, and hopefully we can work whatever it is out.

But maybe instead of dismissing Dan's thoughts because you don't get the link he's making, people could try to see where he's coming from instead of writing them off straight away.

I really don't think I "dismissed" his thoughts and instead asked the community here to explain it to me, which you did so thank you. I don't think I "wrote them off" either, I just thought it was a little strange the way he approached it and I suggested that maybe an easier way to go about it would be to say a clear disclaimer rather than a few quick comments that left a lot of us confused. If Dan is uncomfortable with something that's his right, who am I to tell him how to feel, but it was the lack of clarity I was criticizing. I'm sorry if you perceived it as me attacking Dan for his opinions but that's not at all what I meant to do. I don't feel negatively towards Dan for his opinion, he can have whatever opinions he feels are right.

No it wasn't aimed right at you, it was just general ranting lol

I feel like its absolutely appropriate to call to question shit he says (or anyone says, nobody is safe ) and I actively participated in, and saw both sides, of the 'bitch' argument. But it sometimes feels like he can't do right for doing wrong when it flips within the same week. And I understand that we'll react according to what he says which can change too, but to me the reaction ('the', not yours specifically) did feel dismissive in this case. The instant reaction wasn't 'I wonder what he meant by that', it was 'that was out of place and forced'. But after a few people explained another perspective opinions have opened up and that's totally cool.

On the clarity point - I suppose its often easy to assume its obvious when its your own thoughts/experiences, but equally I doubt he'd want to go into those even if he realised it would help with the clarity.

Of course it doesn't make this place not friendly. My point was that this forum is overwhelmingly supportive of the boys and so I dread to think how others would judge him over stuff like that.

Anyway I think I'm a bit too emotionally tied to this specific issue so I'll take a step back

[fancybum]

So it's okay to pick him apart for one word (saying bitch) for a page or so, but expressing confusion over something he said and saying maybe it was out of place is picking him apart and going too far? All of a sudden this forum isn't friendly anymore? I give up. Honestly I feel like I can't express an opinion in front of you, fancybum, because as soon as I do I feel like you come for me. If you have a personal problem with me, please bring to to DM, and hopefully we can work whatever it is out.

Sorry I honestly don't mean to be coming for you (phrasing) often, do I? That whole 'bitch' conversation was on my mind with 'jesus christ Dan can't say anything without a pile on' and I never even commented on that while it was going on because it annoyed me, but anybody feeling offended by, yes, a misogynistic word, is valid, so I stayed out of it. But no, I never said it's 'okay' to pick him apart for one word. And you weren't the only one questioning the 'gender roles' thing, you just responded to my comment, so I responded in turn. I'll pass on the DMing thanks, but apologies if I've ever singled you out, I'll engage less.

[spaceguitar]

Sup guys. I've taken a bit if a D+P break, perhaps become more of a casual fan. I just feel the need to express that this video is pretty cute. What's strong about it imo is D+P's dynamic. I love when they react to each other, and them judging each others outfits made me weirdly happy. I have not watched the whole thing, but i will probs get around to it and then possibly post again.

I read some of the recent convos on idb and found the whole 'dirty bitches' discussion very interesting. I love the range of opinions on this website. At first I was like whatever (about Dan saying that) and then posters had me reevaluating in a millisecond with their well thought out posts.

[LurkingTrash]

Ha I'm late, took so much time to catch up with you guys, this thread is going fast today.

Anyways, today was a GOOD day for us, wasn't it? (not so much for my productivity, I guess I'll just stay up half of the night to do everything I should have done instead of watching all of it twice) We got quite a lot of content!

The Liveshow: Phil never fails to make me smile during the whole duration of his liveshows but today this was even more present, I always have a great mood after it. He was in a great mood, just hearts and trashcans today for this one.

Youtubers React: Finally a good one! liked the bit with Phil talking about life x satisfaction.

Sims: Lovely, lovely, lovely. At first I thought it was a bit boring and uneventful but I quickly realized this was mostly due to my unrealistic high expectations for it, it was a good video with a lot of good moments to discuss and I'm loving reading all you guys reactions. I have a huge soft spot for the sims videos. Something was kinda off for me but it finally clicked when you guys talked about them walking on eggshells/being really careful and I agree and I look back and wonder how I didn't expect this before of course they know this one is going to be dissected for phan.
oh, and also: 2022. I don't know if I'm amazed at the detail of if I want to punch them. in the face.

[boredtears]

The consent issue is a completely different topic and has little to do with this. I'm not okay with him joking about consent and turning it into a joke, consent is a serious thing.

I feel like Dan mentioning consent a lot over the past year is possibly provoked by how he has been treated by other youtubers. That whole thing with Glozell twerking all over him without his permission, Shane objectifying him, and now goddamn Onison & all his grossness.

I remember Dan trying to address the Glozell thing in a casual way, something like "I did not consent to that" but then trying to laugh it off, probably as a way of trying to let his fans know not to support that kind of behaviour from people like Shane etc. without making trouble with the other youtubers or sparking too much drama.

Also, his whole schtick is using humour as a coping mechanism for stuff - his social awkwardness, fears etc., so I feel like this is just his way of feeling around the issue and working his way through all the weird shit that's happened recently because of people trying to capitalise off of his fan base.

TL;DR I'm not offended by the consent jokes bc I see them as Dan's way of normalising the issue/working his way through the consent issues he's faced in recent months

I'd be interested in hearing other opinions though

[kuensukki]

Why are people complaining that Dan gets too discussed!? Especially if said people wrote paragraphs and paragraphs in response. Honestly this forum has a Dan analyzing kink and he can say one word out of place and everyone will rush to discuss and defend but it's something I've accepted. It's not something that's wrong just how things are around here. If Phil is not being discussed I disappear (and bitch to friends) and reappear when he is, it's that simple. There's no need to attack someone who just brought up an observation they saw in the video

[bluewho]

'HELLO DAN AND PHIL GAMES WEDDING GUESTS' < I fixed it. You're welcome.

I literally just posted this exact same thing, great minds

And Dan; if you are so against society and its gender rolls... why don't you just go against it? Or move out to the woods? lol. Not hating but I feel like he has been going on and on about this for a few weeks now without reaching a climax. Or he just got soo inspired by some artist and the world of "aesthetic" that he himself want to be one of them...

he does, in his own way - even voicing a note/objection is challenging it and going against it

I don't see what moving out to the woods has to do with wanting to improve society or going against gender roles

a few comments here and there does not equal going on and on in my opinion, and even if he was 'going on and on' wouldn't this be a good thing? is this not a positive thing for him to talk about? Why should articulating an an opinion about a societal issue reach 'a climax'? Incidentally, not that it's necessary, but I think it has since he is enacting and speaking in more and more gender non-conformist ways.

Why would commentary on gender roles have to be inspired by 'some artist' and 'the world of aesthetic'? What has 'the world of aesthetic' got to do at all with gender roles? Who is 'them'? Tumblr users? People who break gender roles? People who feel strongly about societal issues? Good people who actually give a shit about the problems they see in society around them? Either way, yes I guess he is 'them' - if you want to go around drawing us/them lines all over everything

I hope none of this comes across harsh, it's really nothing personal, I just take issue with a few of these points but I'm probably taking it all too seriously

Lurktacularr
I didn't understand the gender rolls comments at the time, but reading through your post has made it clear to me, and I'm glad he spoke up about it I think most of the commenters on here were trying to ascertain what he was talking about exactly, and when you don't understand what someone's talking about it naturally looks out of place to you - 'forced' and 'unnatural'. Even I saw it this way, but I would never say that means he should stop talking about issues like this just because some people might not understand straight away - because at the very least it gets people thinking. It got me thinking, and I learnt something new, a difference was made so what do you know

The consent issue is a completely different topic and has little to do with this. I'm not okay with him joking about consent and turning it into a joke, consent is a serious thing. ...Why doesn't he treat consent as seriously as he treats gender roles? I may never know.

I also felt uneasy about his making a joke out of consent, as you correctly point out - it's not something that should be joked about. But in the last Pokemon Go video - I don't have a timestamp - but he said and I quote "Consent, that's important." Which has just made me think that this is the point he really believes and consistently tries to get across - he's just clumsy sometimes and perpetually comical/sarcastic so sometimes it gets a bit mangled. In regards to that topic, I believe your advice would apply well eevee, that he should just try and be clearer about what he's saying. But I know he means well and I think it's good that he speaks about these things at all.

did we discuss why dan brings up god every time dilitha woohoo? is it likely because of his christian grandma upbringing or something? he muttered "society" whilst clapping, what does that even mean

I think he was trying to say that people think you should get married so you can have sex without it being a sin/ going against God's wishes - but that he views this as a societal view. Followed up by sarcastic clapping, so I'm guessing he disagrees with this societal view. Pretty in line with his agnosticism/atheism, pretty in line with the view that you don't need to get married which could explain why he's not married to Phil.

re: the dirty bitches discussion - I am a totally biased source But I think Dan would have wanted us to have that discussion - considering he himself had a discussion with the stand up to cancer folks about a picture that was potentially whitewashing. If we don't challenge these things, we won't think about them and the next time some guy does call a girl a bitch with overtly sexist motivations, we might just accept it or be less aware and informed about it. Also, Dan referring to a man and a woman (Summer and Zion) in this video as 'Cheesy Bitches' made me think that this is something Dan just says to people regardless of their gender. That doesn't make what he said unproblematic, but I no longer think he uses it as a gender slur as per some of the concerns expressed here or on twitter I lose track.


I can't edit my timestamps post anymore and I forgot to spoiler it, it's too long I'm sorry

[blueapple_x]

Ok this is kind of getting real weird and off-topic but in the completely contextless scenario you've provided: No. Add a bit of context and who knows. If the context is just: need two teams, let's do boys vs girls for the sake of simplicity, then who cares. The societal expectations (and pressure in cases like Lurktacularr explained) when it comes to following 'traditions' muddies the waters of what a person wants to do and what a person is pressured to do, based on nothing more than their gender, then yes, shit gets weird. What's the issue I'm missing here.

edit blueapple_x no I know nobody's calling him problematic here - my point was he gets called problematic one day and then gets accused of overkill the next. Re your 'teams' example, not particularly since presumably they're not being split based on a presumed judgement over them only being friends with the same gender, and would presumably not be undertaking different activities based on their gender, but that example was a little vague to really give a proper answer

edit 2 - this may be a double post cos i fucked up my editing its late I'm tired SORREH

The example was meant to be simplified for a reason. The basic act of acknowledging/separating by gender can be called many things but to apply the term 'gender roles' here doesn't make sense to me either unless the intent is to limit individuals based on how society thinks different genders should act: "you HAVE to/ you CAN'T do this because you're a ____".

I believe I said before that Dan probably wanted to cover all bases because some people would see it as a gender role thing rather than a tradition thing (likely depends on factors like culture, religion, family customs, etc....and of course, how one personally defines the term gender role). For some, the term just seemed out of context likely because of factors listed above and also because a lot of couples choose to do mixed/combined parties and it's not a big deal. They can also choose to do the traditional bachelor/bachelorette party and it's not a big deal/seen as following gender roles. But again, this is different based on the factors I listed above.

I feel like its absolutely appropriate to call to question shit he says (or anyone says, nobody is safe ) and I actively participated in, and saw both sides, of the 'bitch' argument. But it sometimes feels like he can't do right for doing wrong when it flips within the same week. And I understand that we'll react according to what he says which can change too, but to me the reaction ('the', not yours specifically) did feel dismissive in this case. The instant reaction wasn't 'I wonder what he meant by that', it was 'that was out of place and forced'. But after a few people explained another perspective opinions have opened up and that's totally cool.

On the clarity point - I suppose its often easy to assume its obvious when its your own thoughts/experiences, but equally I doubt he'd want to go into those even if he realised it would help with the clarity.

Of course it doesn't make this place not friendly. My point was that this forum is overwhelmingly supportive of the boys and so I dread to think how others would judge him over stuff like that.

Anyway I think I'm a bit too emotionally tied to this specific issue so I'll take a step back

I'm glad you can acknowledge that's your personal opinion/interpretation of what was said. For the record, in case you were referring to me, I didn't mean for anyone to interpret what I said as being dismissive. Reviews on a video/anything they put out will always be subjective and personal to each individual. I automatically add "in my opinion" in my head when I'm reading posts and it helps me not take things too personally.

Hopefully everything is all clarified and people understand that Dan wasn't being attacked/harshly criticized/dismissed/whatever other insult/negative interpretation can be thought of.

[jesp]

Moderating

And Dan; if you are so against society and its gender rolls... why don't you just go against it? Or move out to the woods? lol. Not hating but I feel like he has been going on and on about this for a few weeks now without reaching a climax. Or he just got soo inspired by some artist and the world of "aesthetic" that he himself want to be one of them...

he does, in his own way - even voicing a note/objection is challenging it and going against it

I don't see what moving out to the woods has to do with wanting to improve society or going against gender roles

a few comments here and there does not equal going on and on in my opinion, and even if he was 'going on and on' wouldn't this be a good thing? is this not a positive thing for him to talk about? Why should articulating an an opinion about a societal issue reach 'a climax'? Incidentally, not that it's necessary, but I think it has since he is enacting and speaking in more and more gender non-conformist ways.

Why would commentary on gender roles have to be inspired by 'some artist' and 'the world of aesthetic'? What has 'the world of aesthetic' got to do at all with gender roles? Who is 'them'? Tumblr users? People who break gender roles? People who feel strongly about societal issues? Good people who actually give a shit about the problems they see in society around them? Either way, yes I guess he is 'them' - if you want to go around drawing us/them lines all over everything

bluewho, and everyone else, I'd just like to ask that you take a moment to consider readability when using different colours for text in your posts, especially when it's a large part of a post. On the default theme it's easy to read, but on the dark theme it's close to illegible.

[anathema]

Wedding video notes and timestamps.

00:00 "Hello Dan and Phil Games wedding guests."

oh that's just me, falling into the phan trashcan at 00:01

00:02 them sitting there in suits talking about weddings is already too much for my phan trash heart tbh

5:11 Summer Holiday is/isn't a ho for hitting on Dil before his wedding

8:55 If Dan, I mean Tabitha, uses her posture she can stay smaller than her life partner Phil, I mean Dil.

9:23 "As like a symbol of masculinity and business and stuff it's quite funny that it's just like a pointless piece of accessorizing cloth." Dan you commie

9:32 Ties are a symbol of masculinity, and they're "just boring" says Dan.

11:21 Dangerous for Tabitha to be around Eliza when she's feeling flirty, bisexuality exists etc

11:44 They didn't send an invite to the BP corporation because "that's the worst" BP because oil spill - Dan's a commie part 2

12:31 "The brotable". Do you think they just name everything in their house like this; the brotable, the brofa, the brookcase, the bromance, the brojobs

12:36 They both read out 'take a slice together' together, at the same time, in the same tone

12:48 Summer and Zion are "Cheesy Bitches". Zion's a guy so this must be just something Dan says now regardless of the gender of the person he's talking to? Did he do this deliberately to subvert the assumption that 'bitch' is a term you can apply to women only?

13:38 "Aww so Dil's having his brotime, she's having her girltime, Dan and Phil have not done anything to smash gender roles, this is a great video..." . There are a few references like this - but I don't understand what is so stereotypical about going out with friends before your wedding? Like what gender roles are there to smash Dan?

13:55 Dan thinks the funny story Tabitha would tell about Dil would involve Dil saying "marriage that's like a ball and chain, fuck that" - because you know Dil, he wouldn't commit to anything, not even a shade of nail.

15:13 "Remember, we're progressive Phil."

16:34 'we're', 'we', 'our', 'us', 'our life story', 'we'...

17:10 Travis can come because he has blond hair (?)

17:52 'we' want a wedding in the park, cherry blossoms flowing

18:17 Dan, wearing a leather tie, expresses his concern that Dil will show up to his wedding wearing something leather. If that isn't projection tell me what is.

18:44 Phil being not such a cinnamon roll - he thinks 'Daddy's girl' is a 'weird thing to call' a wedding arch but the only way that's weird is if, ya know, you think that way. Lay off the porn Phil.

19:23 i just heard dan say 'we should get married now' all my dreams are alive

19:37 "Aw I feel so happy for them... everything's going so well". Now you know how the phandom feel watching you two sappy gits.

20:06 Blond Travis is thinking about Dil, bisexuality exists etc

20:20 we establish that Dan and Phil aren't ready for marriage.

20:22 wedding conveniently starts

rn:


21:05 huge jumpcut, insert chosen conspiracy theory here

21:28 D&P: 'This is basically just us living out our dreams'. me: 'just get married then you sappy gits' I'm so problematic, I'm just going to go and make some toast.

25:52 'The most fun I've ever had.' Over a microwave?! Are you kidding me?! If you are going to troll us at least do it properly and say this when they were going down the aisle or something, this is just lazy smh

26:43 'And now God doesn't hate them [when they have sex] because they are married, yay society.'

27:22 'Kids, achieving their dreams, mansions and death. That is life people.' This is the kind of cynical existential content I signed up for tbh.

Also, I found this video on tumblr and it's hilarious so I thought I would share

[kuensukki]

Wedding video notes and timestamps.

00:00 "Hello Dan and Phil Games wedding guests."

oh that's just me, falling into the phan trashcan at 00:01

00:02 them sitting there in suits talking about weddings is already too much for my phan trash heart tbh

5:11 Summer Holiday is/isn't a ho for hitting on Dil before his wedding

8:55 If Dan, I mean Tabitha, uses her posture she can stay smaller than her life partner Phil, I mean Dil.

9:23 "As like a symbol of masculinity and business and stuff it's quite funny that it's just like a pointless piece of accessorizing cloth." Dan you commie

9:32 Ties are a symbol of masculinity, and they're "just boring" says Dan.

11:21 Dangerous for Tabitha to be around Eliza when she's feeling flirty, bisexuality exists etc

11:44 They didn't send an invite to the BP corporation because "that's the worst" BP because oil spill - Dan's a commie part 2

12:31 "The brotable". Do you think they just name everything in their house like this; the brotable, the brofa, the brookcase, the bromance, the brojobs

12:36 They both read out 'take a slice together' together, at the same time, in the same tone

12:48 Summer and Zion are "Cheesy Bitches". Zion's a guy so this must be just something Dan says now regardless of the gender of the person he's talking to? Did he do this deliberately to subvert the assumption that 'bitch' is a term you can apply to women only?

13:38 "Aww so Dil's having his brotime, she's having her girltime, Dan and Phil have not done anything to smash gender roles, this is a great video..." . There are a few references like this - but I don't understand what is so stereotypical about going out with friends before your wedding? Like what gender roles are there to smash Dan?

13:55 Dan thinks the funny story Tabitha would tell about Dil would involve Dil saying "marriage that's like a ball and chain, fuck that" - because you know Dil, he wouldn't commit to anything, not even a shade of nail.

15:13 "Remember, we're progressive Phil."

16:34 'we're', 'we', 'our', 'us', 'our life story', 'we'...

17:10 Travis can come because he has blond hair (?)

17:52 'we' want a wedding in the park, cherry blossoms flowing

18:17 Dan, wearing a leather tie, expresses his concern that Dil will show up to his wedding wearing something leather. If that isn't projection tell me what is.

18:44 Phil being not such a cinnamon roll - he thinks 'Daddy's girl' is a 'weird thing to call' a wedding arch but the only way that's weird is if, ya know, you think that way. Lay off the porn Phil.

19:23 i just heard dan say 'we should get married now' all my dreams are alive

19:37 "Aw I feel so happy for them... everything's going so well". Now you know how the phandom feel watching you two sappy gits.

20:06 Blond Travis is thinking about Dil, bisexuality exists etc

20:20 we establish that Dan and Phil aren't ready for marriage.

20:22 wedding conveniently starts

rn:


21:05 huge jumpcut, insert chosen conspiracy theory here

21:28 D&P: 'This is basically just us living out our dreams'. me: 'just get married then you sappy gits' I'm so problematic, I'm just going to go and make some toast.

25:52 'The most fun I've ever had.' Over a microwave?! Are you kidding me?! If you are going to troll us at least do it properly and say this when they were going down the aisle or something, this is just lazy smh

26:43 'And now God doesn't hate them [when they have sex] because they are married, yay society.'

27:22 'Kids, achieving their dreams, mansions and death. That is life people.' This is the kind of cynical existential content I signed up for tbh.

Also, I found this video on tumblr and it's hilarious so I thought I would share

It's funny to me because now all the old phan things have been ruined. When they acknowledge an old quote from the past I always freak out then associate the phrase with the new (platonic acting) deppy instead of their horny counterparts I even got scared when Dan said we would comment "this is the song he'll play for Phil" or when Phil admitted he read phanfiction. This past video when Dil and tabitha stood next to each other and Phil said "they look so cute together, screenshot" I felt like he was subtly Indirecting me (hides my 7 dated folders of cute phan screenshots )

They are so painfully aware of every phandom cliche and I feel like they always subtly bring that back. The recent 2022 confirmed that for me. It also makes me curious on how two platonic ( ) bros can enjoy and actively participate in something that involves them being together whether it's joking about engagements and weddings together and projected two Sims in a relationship to themselves or reading and writing fanfiction. Just some food for thought

Also Lurktacular I really enjoyed you post on gender roles as well as Phil's recent weight gain. I love seeing him get a bit heavier and look a little less tiny

[Diyes_Celine]

Why are people complaining that Dan gets too discussed!? Especially if said people wrote paragraphs and paragraphs in response. Honestly this forum has a Dan analyzing kink and he can say one word out of place and everyone will rush to discuss and defend but it's something I've accepted. It's not something that's wrong just how things are around here. If Phil is not being discussed I disappear (and bitch to friends) and reappear when he is, it's that simple. There's no need to attack someone who just brought up an observation they saw in the video

High five!
See you guys after your Dan discussion.

[blueapple_x]

Times like this, I honestly think back to Dan's diss where he said people would say the way he makes toast is problematic. I don't understand how he's held to this perfect level of social awareness where even two casual mentions in a video are considered out of place and too much, despite being considered problematic for saying the word 'bitch' no less than 2 days ago. And yet Phil is left unaccountable for any of this shit because what, he just doesn't bother to address anything at all ever?

In that sense, would you rather Dan just shut up about it? I wouldn't. I like that he speaks his mind, even if sometimes it doesn't quite come out right, although I don't think this is one of those times. I got what he meant. And we all wonder where his crippling anxiety over his output comes from? He gets picked apart because he gives more and whilst I understand that (its more fodder, just like speculation over his sexuality) it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

Nobody is calling him problematic here. Seems like people are getting confused about people being confused over something Dan said

edit blueapple_x no I know nobody's calling him problematic here - my point was he gets called problematic one day and then gets accused of overkill the next

Sorry I forgot to respond to this part. I'll be brief:

I know you didn't mean we were literally calling him problematic. Sorry I should've clarified. I used the word problematic to encompass any kind of problem/criticism people have and I wanted to illustrate that him being "accused of overkill" (which could be considered a problem) wasn't actually a problem to anyone at all afaik. Does that make sense? Basically I meant I don't think anyone found a big problem with what he said at all...aka nobody is calling him problematic/seeing it as problem---observations were simply voiced based on confusion lol.

Ok I think I've said all I wanted to say

[teamug]

All by myself...on this island of fakephan because I think the dil/tabs wedding vid was boring. Deps were eye-candy in their fancy suits for a few moments but I didn't find it cute or funny or sweet. Usually if I find a vid boring, atleast the bants will make it worth it, but this time, predictable, uninspired, bland. I was hoping for more fun, more silliness,but meh.

FYI if you want people to look back fondly at your wedding - food and music, nobody gives a poop about ceremonies and tradition, focus on food and music.

[swofro]

Hi, I am here for massive summary of Phil's liveshow!! (and I haven't read the past 4 pages, soz if anything is repetitive)


Mr Philip himself
He looks so lovely today! His skin is glowy and he has that haircut that is going well for him, and he looks like a vampire, and I love that so much.

Liveshow Extended Summary

Phil forgot to tweet that he is having a liveshow, so everyone has a 'private show' for 10 minutes. Not the kind of private show I want, Phil. I wish the private show will involve bits of cheeky knee and little bits of chest hair.

Phil is having a new obsession with Burrito because he test out an app and can choose the fillings and have them send to his doorstep. I don't know how that's different from Subway, but okay.

He mention the suits tweet (best selfie this year hand down, btw) and tease a bit about Dilitha wedding and how the liveshow is the stag night / hen do for the wedding. I always find it weird how Phil always left the thumbnail making to the last moment but his thumbnails are so good. I envy that kind of talent (or I am really the worse person who can't photoshop anything even for her life lol)

Btdubs, I hate Dan and Phil for giving me so many contents on the dawn of the busiest day ever. (Happy Eid to other people who are celebrating besides me )

'You shouldn't hope for Dil wearing pants to the wedding' - what a massive liar. Liar with a straight face. stop lying to me.

Adidas. Phil pronounce it weirdly, it sounds so wrong. He had an Adidas coat once. I mean, how do you have an Adidas coat but no sporting gear from them? That is just a mess. #nospon

Phil mentioned he was rummaging his drawers for stuff and found an old triops kit, so he is trying to hatch them in some water tank. (Also flashback to the old Simon the shrimp vid that I actually watch the other day). I love the prospect of Phil getting another pet, he clearly wants to take care of something. Get this man a dog, or they clearly need to move out of the house to get a koi pond.

I also love that Phil is so excited for the triops. He said he wasn't gonna make a video of it, because had 'been there, done that' aaaages ago. He will updates about the triops on liveshows and makes it a younow project or something like that. He also invites the chat to name the triops if any of it hatch.

Dan still hasn't watch Terminator. Lol. Even I, the person who watch movies 4 years after it comes out had watch Terminator and young Arnold Swazerearesfnsceger yes, that was intentional, I was lazy to find out how to type his name properly, soz Arnie. Phil loves young Arnold, btw.

Chat saw Bulbasaur plushie at the back

Plant update He have no idea why his plant get brown tips. Do we have plant experts here? Was it because the plant doesn't get enough sunlight? Was it because Martyn doesn't water them enough?

! They are going to make some enhance e-book thing where you can click on some pictures and get some anecdotes. wtf, now I want that ebook but I don't generally like ebooks because I need to touch the paper. And I also don't have a tab, so *sigh*

Baking vid definitely will be coming either on Christmas or Halloween. i really hope for Christmas because we haven't had one for a long time, and the last one was back in Manchester flat where we still speculate whether Dan is holding Phil's hand or his own hand.

Chat ask what did he like most about his shirt. He says "The tiger. Rawr"

Phil also miss Japhan and might go there next year. #phangetmarriedinjapan

Chat ask how long the liveshow gonna be. Phil says the liveshow gonna be a medium-length because he wants to do last touch of on Dilitha wedding. What a liar. He deliberately start 15 minutes late so he can finish around 45 minutes mark. Lol.

Phil says he bought another DVD (of something, I can't remember) and candles besides his Terminators DVDs, and wonder what the person packing his things gonna think about it. I so relate because I recently went on a shopping spree and bought a bra, two DVDs (The Battle of the 5 Armies and Civil War), an electric baking mixer, measuring cups + spoons, and 2 eyeliners. They probably gonna think I am having a big weekend date thing coming up but in reality, my mum just need a new mixer and I fancy a new bra. Lol.

More candle hauls! I love the Chrismassy one called something-that-i-don't-know-how-to-spell. Phil loves the autumn nights one.

Hey, Halloween early celebrators

I can't think about Halloween on September!!!

I don't even have PSL (yet)

Phil mention London going to get to 31 degree someday (next Monday? today? idk) and I was shocked. How was that possible in the UK? Someone please tell me I misheard that part because that's crazy

Phil called both Dan and Dil D-Slice. Lol.

Phil mentioned attending a wedding and I was shocked and have sudden flashback of that certain wedding they attend where they wore suits, before I realised he was talking about Dilitha wedding. I am an idiot.

Love the story of how some companytypoed their phone number on their brochurs, and Phil's house get the calls from the customers instead for about 3 months. So many people are apparently calling to buy some ice lollies machine. Haha. Phone ringing always stressed me out, I can't imagine how the Lesters handle it.

Also, Phil mention he had eaten his last ice cream before the cold season. I have no idea why he did that because for me, ice creams are for all season. It doesn't really have to do with weather, it is a comfort food, Philly!!

Yes to all proposals.

Chat says 'you really suit the suit' and Phil approves of the pun.

Chat ask him to scream LESLIE! and he did. What a dumb. He is so adorable

Phil doesn't like IPhone 7, and gonna stick with his IPhone 6. Great decision Phil, or you really gonna look like a cab driver with the earpod thing going on. I was a bit scared when Phil undo his Iphone cover thing to show his white Iphone because he is a clumsy mess. But he also admits that this is usually the time when he gonna accidentally smash his phone.

He watch the XFactor and love being a judge who criticises on people during auditions. Same. He also hates that there is less auditions footage because they want to do that 10 minutes background and interview reel for the competitors. Same. I have the same feeling. For singing contest, I always found the auditions are the best part because there are so many essence in it, the fun, the talent, details touchy footage and dramas. When things get serious, everything will become dull and monotone and just the same honestly, unless you are really good.

Phil hates pineapples on pizza. Pineapples on pizza is the best part because it gives the sweetness, balancing the taste of the pizza. You're just saying that because you don't live somewhere where pineapples can grow in your backyard or besides your house.

He had been busy doing background thing on TATINOF, doing photoshoots, trailer and stuff. There are going to be 2 YTRed videos, I wonder if one of them gonna be on AP and the other goes on DINOF or what. But no EU TATINOF mention though, does it not work out well or what?

Discussing the clump tweet. Basically Phil saw a clump of hair when he was walking somewhere and it rolls like tumbleweed (a tumbleweave lol) but I personally think it is that thing that cat spit out when they are not healthy, the hairball thing?

Chat ask whether One Direction will come back. Phil said yes, when they are all 75.

Cactus vs Venus Flytrap. phil doesn't really like venus flytrap because he pities the fly that flew into the plant. I can relate. Some ants are making nest inside the small hole on my brick wall of my house the other day and it makes me uncomfortable because there are so much of them together and I spray them with the anti insect spray thing but I feel bad when they die.

The Panda thing! Yes! Phil called himself the panda lord because he managed to save them from being endangered. Lol. What an angel.

short conclusion im so tired of typing
the liveshow, love Phil, love his bubbly personality, love his hair, love.

[mysterylovescompany]

swofro, that's such an entertaining recap, thank you so much

[kay]

His breeding kink is always fascinating with me. Hamster breeder as a high school student and now shrimp breeder as an adult. Its cool to see someone so proudly excited at such a strange hobby. I know the "Phil is weird banner" is overdone but he really is a strange guy with niche interests which makes him all the more endearing. On why he likes it: I've always seen Phil as someone who likes caring for things and this is another example of that. Next up Phil: adopt a child please.

I'm catching up and this is a few pages back but I agree totally with this, and immediately thought of the part of the PT play through when they find the baby in the sink and Dan says (jokingly) "Flush it?" and Phil replies, "Care for it!" Maybe silly but I remember aww-ing at that.

Re: Howlter wedding, this was so cute! One of my favorite Dil videos, top quality #bants boys. A lot of moments made me actually laugh out loud, sometimes I feel like the jokes are super forced or one of them isn't into playing at the moment, but they both felt on and genuinely into it.

My favorite moments were longer than I expected

-Poor Tabs got caught cutting one loose.
-Phil's "OOH!" he always does will forever now remind me of Phanimations
-Their tie tangent, why was this sweet to me? bye
-Tabitha's dancing, what the actual fuck, I cracked up so hard at this
-"Dil's murdered Bob Pancakes and put him into a bin bag!" "Or maybe he's just left and he's taking the trash out like a responsible guy." "....That's what he wants you to think."
-Phil rocking back and forth chanting MIA YANG while Dan tried to talk him out of it and inevitably lost, this is how it's going to go when they're booking actual vendors for the actual wedding fight me
-Cherry blossoms mention, bye again
-Them freaking out about how good Dil and Tbag look ngl I was hoping they'd have a moment where they could dress them and pick their outfits for the big day so Dan could freak out and pick the perfectly detailed look all the way down to Dil's matching socks and the directions that Tabitha's dress pleats fell and Phil could say "that's nice" a bunch of times and offer up suggestions that Dan would eventually shoot down and Phil would shrug about. This would've been fun to watch
-Phil I see you look at the monitor when Dan says "look at that beautiful scene" and sighs dreamily gtfo
-THE WEDDING FISH HAS RISEN, and Dan's fond af look for "took it too far"
-"This is basically us living out our dreams" Dan get out and don't come back
-Erica Pendleton "in a white dress as well does this woman have no respect, she won't spoil it. she will not spoil it." "fight her."
-"I like that their first dance was with all their friends." this made me feel warm and fuzzy aw.
-freaking out about a new microwave, they're so domestic and a pair of gross homebodies ugh

OK on second watch through and picking out favorite moments, I liked this even more. Like starlight-still said, eggshelly and safe in regards to any kind of relationship/wedding/etc mentions but as usual we don't know why and we never will. Random obsv - they're are so many quotes to pull for thread titles, honestly. I'm going to watch it through again and suggest about 50.

at 23.15-23:27 "This is where I would I chop my hand off at ??Our?? wedding" so what is this about Philly? Did you just accidentally out Phan or what are you on about m8?

I listened to it again and thought he said "a wedding" here, also Dan doesn't react at all and I feel like we'd get a panicked look and/or jump cut if so. But maybe I'm totally wrong

They should have decorated more. I was expecting to see bridezilla!Dan. Disappoints.

Same, I was hoping for building-Dil's-house level of excitement but it felt a bit subdued, didn't it? I attribute this to the fact that he didn't realize he could blow all that money since it was in the park, but I would've loved to see a long and drawn out wedding day shopping spree for sure

Re: gender roles,

In that sense, would you rather Dan just shut up about it? I wouldn't. I like that he speaks his mind, even if sometimes it doesn't quite come out right, although I don't think this is one of those times. I got what he meant. And we all wonder where his crippling anxiety over his output comes from? He gets picked apart because he gives more and whilst I understand that (its more fodder, just like speculation over his sexuality) it sometimes frustrates me when even on a friendly forum like this he gets picked apart for about 10 seconds of a half hour video.

[RiriPandaHeart2]

*drops this* *leaves and runs away*

[SquishPhan]

Enjoyed reading your post swofro.

*drops this* *leaves and runs away*

[swofro]

Thanks mysterylovecompany and squishphan, glad you like it.

20:22 wedding conveniently starts

rn:

I seriously thought you post a picture of Jedward and I was like what does Jedward has to do with anything? And then realise they are trolls

21:05 huge jumpcut, insert chosen conspiracy theory here

My theory: here is where they discuss they should make the wedding start at 20:22 timestamp for the lols

[bluewho]

Also, I found this video on tumblr and it's hilarious so I thought I would share

this is literally how I reacted

Why are people complaining that Dan gets too discussed!? Especially if said people wrote paragraphs and paragraphs in response. Honestly this forum has a Dan analyzing kink and he can say one word out of place and everyone will rush to discuss and defend but it's something I've accepted. It's not something that's wrong just how things are around here. If Phil is not being discussed I disappear (and bitch to friends) and reappear when he is, it's that simple. There's no need to attack someone who just brought up an observation they saw in the video

High five!
See you guys after your Dan discussion.

While I'm probably offender number one, I completely agree with this. I thoroughly expected to come to IDB and find discussion of this delightful slip up:

18:44 Phil being not such a cinnamon roll - he thinks 'Daddy's girl' is a 'weird thing to call' a wedding arch but the only way that's weird is if, ya know, you think that way. Lay off the porn Phil.

20:22 wedding conveniently starts

rn:

I seriously thought you post a picture of Jedward and I was like what does Jedward has to do with anything? And then realise they are trolls

i see the resemblance, uncanny.



Sorry I didn't realize the colors wouldn't quite come out properly on the dark theme. I kind of forgot about the dark theme to be honest!