Trump, Tripping and Introspection (Week 3)
Gets this right out of the way before coming back to it an hour from now (a speed talking (did he follow through on that crack snorting idea) stressful (to me) hour from now):
1:10 “I hope you’ve had a peaceable week, mine’s been pretty eventful. Going away this weekend, so I’ve been block-filming a whole bunch of videos, which has been fun, don’t know about you."
Prompted Phil Mention
25:25 (chat) Did the gaming chair break?
“Yeah, Phil has broken the gaming chair"
“There was an important update where me and Phil get a new office chair”
“Dan and Phil have got a new one!”
38:55 (chat) Talk about Phil’s wife and unborn child
“What’s this, Phoebe? Please let me know"
39:23 (chat) There’s a rumour that Phil has a secret wife and child
“Oh sh— Oh my God. You heard about that? Damn, how did you find out? Oh God. It’s so true, yep, Sabrina and their child Lola. How did you find out? Phil has been keeping that a secret for so long. This is just a fake apartment that he uses to film in when he’s not spending time with his real family. (sighs) And he thought he could get to his birthday before he made a video telling you all about the truth. Oh I can’t believe you all found out about it. You guys with your theories on the internet are just so good. (laughs) That’s quite funny."
43:50 (reads from chat) “You and Phil make my day”
53:50 (chat) Cool buzzsaw outside your house
“There’s these people behind mine and Phil’s apartment”
“So if you wanna see what’s ruining our lives at the moment, check out Phil’s twitter"
54:40 (chat) Are you and Phil going to Vidcon Anaheim?
Yes indeed.
“Yeah, Phil has broken the gaming chair"
“There was an important update where me and Phil get a new office chair”
“Dan and Phil have got a new one!”
38:55 (chat) Talk about Phil’s wife and unborn child
“What’s this, Phoebe? Please let me know"
39:23 (chat) There’s a rumour that Phil has a secret wife and child
“Oh sh— Oh my God. You heard about that? Damn, how did you find out? Oh God. It’s so true, yep, Sabrina and their child Lola. How did you find out? Phil has been keeping that a secret for so long. This is just a fake apartment that he uses to film in when he’s not spending time with his real family. (sighs) And he thought he could get to his birthday before he made a video telling you all about the truth. Oh I can’t believe you all found out about it. You guys with your theories on the internet are just so good. (laughs) That’s quite funny."
43:50 (reads from chat) “You and Phil make my day”
53:50 (chat) Cool buzzsaw outside your house
“There’s these people behind mine and Phil’s apartment”
“So if you wanna see what’s ruining our lives at the moment, check out Phil’s twitter"
54:40 (chat) Are you and Phil going to Vidcon Anaheim?
Yes indeed.
23:35 “[I was going to do a YT unboxing video, but then [Alfie] did it first] and then Phil did it. Anyway.”
(does he actually believe he would have made that video if Alfie hadn’t? I don’t understand the pushing of this narrative- it would have been a boring video and he knows it, therefore he knows he wouldn’t have bothered making it. Just let it go. Also Tomska did it in Last Week before anybody else, so who cares that Alfie even exists tbh— why is any of this relevant to anybody why does he keep saying it)
32:10 “DanAndPhilBAKES, that’s a new channel, or not. DanAndPhilRATESBAKES, danisnotonfire and AmazingPhil are already DanAndPhilBAKES, let’s be honest.”
35:05 “Obviously me and Phil are not doing the BRITS this year” Caspar is
42:15 (chat) I like your hair.
“I like my hair. I feel like my only issue is, unlike Phil, Phil has very black hair and very pale skin, so his fade on the side, his little shaved bit, it looks quite cool and stands out a lot [unlike mine].”
Will get closer shaved sides next time. (chat) No. "Well guess what, ho, that’s what I want my hair to be like, and that’s all that matters.”
“Why did I think my hair looked good in 2011 when it was objectively fucking awful"
50:30 “Speaking of Netflix, guess what Danny and Philly watched? The OA.”
“it’s a sci-fi series”
(IS IT THOUGH< IS IT)
57:15 “I got a new candle.” "Phil got one called ‘Fairytale of New York’” and he got one called ‘Art’
59:55 “Speaking of next week, me and Phil are going up North to hang out with some pals, because it’s Phil’s bday”
“So I’m not going to be here next Tuesday because I’m doing my annual socializing. You need to let me just like, have friends at least once, ok? Don’t be too mean to me. I’ll see you the Tuesday after that."
(I'll go ahead and translate that ‘hang with some pals’ means ‘hang with Phil’s family’ because that’s what Phil offered as a birthday option for himself. So North means IoM and I’ll watch a PointlessBlog video if it turns out I’m wrong. Pray for me. Also will Phil stick to the 'seeing friends' story on Thurs or not mention it at all if he can avoid it? Tune in Thurs and find out on "Where Are the Boundaries Now")
(does he actually believe he would have made that video if Alfie hadn’t? I don’t understand the pushing of this narrative- it would have been a boring video and he knows it, therefore he knows he wouldn’t have bothered making it. Just let it go. Also Tomska did it in Last Week before anybody else, so who cares that Alfie even exists tbh— why is any of this relevant to anybody why does he keep saying it)
32:10 “DanAndPhilBAKES, that’s a new channel, or not. DanAndPhilRATESBAKES, danisnotonfire and AmazingPhil are already DanAndPhilBAKES, let’s be honest.”
35:05 “Obviously me and Phil are not doing the BRITS this year” Caspar is
42:15 (chat) I like your hair.
“I like my hair. I feel like my only issue is, unlike Phil, Phil has very black hair and very pale skin, so his fade on the side, his little shaved bit, it looks quite cool and stands out a lot [unlike mine].”
Will get closer shaved sides next time. (chat) No. "Well guess what, ho, that’s what I want my hair to be like, and that’s all that matters.”
“Why did I think my hair looked good in 2011 when it was objectively fucking awful"
50:30 “Speaking of Netflix, guess what Danny and Philly watched? The OA.”
“it’s a sci-fi series”
(IS IT THOUGH< IS IT)
57:15 “I got a new candle.” "Phil got one called ‘Fairytale of New York’” and he got one called ‘Art’
59:55 “Speaking of next week, me and Phil are going up North to hang out with some pals, because it’s Phil’s bday”
“So I’m not going to be here next Tuesday because I’m doing my annual socializing. You need to let me just like, have friends at least once, ok? Don’t be too mean to me. I’ll see you the Tuesday after that."
(I'll go ahead and translate that ‘hang with some pals’ means ‘hang with Phil’s family’ because that’s what Phil offered as a birthday option for himself. So North means IoM and I’ll watch a PointlessBlog video if it turns out I’m wrong. Pray for me. Also will Phil stick to the 'seeing friends' story on Thurs or not mention it at all if he can avoid it? Tune in Thurs and find out on "Where Are the Boundaries Now")
06:10 “Me and Phil have filmed a Sims video, it’s going to be the next video on DaPG”
21:40 “I found a Go Pro and I’ve taped it to my computer upstairs—‘my computer’— mine and Phil’s editing iMac— up in the office"
(chat corrects his grammar) "‘Phil and I’ indeed. Tangent time: [goes on about articulateness and poshness blah blah blah] “I always say ‘me and Phil’. Phil and I.”
45:55 “Play Monopoly on DaPG”
“24 hour live stream for Millie where Dan and Phil end with stabbing each other”
“A lot of you know that you like Dan and Phil”
46:40 “even the people that have subscribed to danisnotonfire and DanisntPhilGAMES” lmao
“I really can’t just shitpost on danisnotonfire because people really want the quality content."
“or even that video me and Phil did for Comic Relief” I get comments like “I really like your comedy videos that have sketches and impressive editing and make a point and that’s the content I signed up for, I just didn’t sign up to watch you drawing makeup on each other”
(interesting it's an alleged 26 year old male filmmaker offering a negative comment that sticks out to him, not the countless positive ones from not-26 year old not-filmmaker not-males just saying)
“It’s fine, I’m not saying that’s an issue [if less people would watch something with narrower potential ‘mainstream’ appeal], but it does affect the likelihood of us doing something.”
"Maybe card games and boardgames [on DaPG at some point], we’ll see”
“Don’t take me seriously, I’m just ranting off the top of my head."
1:01:15 “Look forward to a dinof video, gonna try and film it this weekend, not a promise. And the next DanAndPhilGAMES video is the Sims, toddler Dab, it’s funny, look forward to it. More videos on the gaming channel, side channel, it’s cool, 2017."
21:40 “I found a Go Pro and I’ve taped it to my computer upstairs—‘my computer’— mine and Phil’s editing iMac— up in the office"
(chat corrects his grammar) "‘Phil and I’ indeed. Tangent time: [goes on about articulateness and poshness blah blah blah] “I always say ‘me and Phil’. Phil and I.”
45:55 “Play Monopoly on DaPG”
“24 hour live stream for Millie where Dan and Phil end with stabbing each other”
“A lot of you know that you like Dan and Phil”
46:40 “even the people that have subscribed to danisnotonfire and DanisntPhilGAMES” lmao
“I really can’t just shitpost on danisnotonfire because people really want the quality content."
“or even that video me and Phil did for Comic Relief” I get comments like “I really like your comedy videos that have sketches and impressive editing and make a point and that’s the content I signed up for, I just didn’t sign up to watch you drawing makeup on each other”
(interesting it's an alleged 26 year old male filmmaker offering a negative comment that sticks out to him, not the countless positive ones from not-26 year old not-filmmaker not-males just saying)
“It’s fine, I’m not saying that’s an issue [if less people would watch something with narrower potential ‘mainstream’ appeal], but it does affect the likelihood of us doing something.”
"Maybe card games and boardgames [on DaPG at some point], we’ll see”
“Don’t take me seriously, I’m just ranting off the top of my head."
1:01:15 “Look forward to a dinof video, gonna try and film it this weekend, not a promise. And the next DanAndPhilGAMES video is the Sims, toddler Dab, it’s funny, look forward to it. More videos on the gaming channel, side channel, it’s cool, 2017."
09:20 “Yes it’s been a challenging week for the world with the whole Trump thing. The Women’s March was quite amazing [..]. What the Women’s March showed is that all these millions of people around the world can come together and just stand up for really good virtues."
11:00 (chat) Tips for when you catch feels for somebody
“Well, you know, you could always just try to be their friend, see if there’s any romantic tingles, see where it leads you. Or you can always just stalk their interests and completely transform yourself to be the kind of person you think they’d like and then marry them, have a happy family, then eventually have a breakdown because you’ll be like ‘I’m not being the person I want to be but my god, this person’s so hot, THE ABS, was it worth it, sacrificing my authenticity?? I just don’t know!’ Um and then write a book about it because that seems pretty interesting."
(I’ll accept projection onto the first sentence, but the rest of it no, shut up Twitter. Writing a book about it =/= tabinof/dapgo as he was talking about writing about a giant failure, as in a tell-all. Unless you want to go with ‘Dan transformed his interests to match those of Phil to get him and now is trapped in an inauthentic life based on superficial interests'. And also pretend that Phil has abs. You do you.)
14:15 (chat) Would you rather be always right or always liked by others?
“It’s that whole thing. Especially if you’re a creative person. Should I just do what I like, or should I do things that I think will be popular so I’m successful? That’s the YT dilemma. I think generally, as various existential philosophers have said, what’s important is authenticity. Because if you try to be successful or popular or liked by people, but not being authentic to yourself, then you’ll never really be happy."
(the upcoming struggle of 'Dan vs. 2017' in a tidy little paragraph)
21:15 (chat) I just watched some old videos of yours
“Ha ha ha! Don’t do that.”
24:25 “They say that people have 2 modes. I have 2 modes: full on nihilist or wholesome. I’m either talking about death, wanting death, joking about death, or I’m saying, ‘Hey be calm, take a deep breath, everything’s cool, Wholesome Howell, everything’s nice’. I have no in-between. Literally there’s no chill. Life or death, it’s full on nihilism or wholesomeness. And that’s just me. And if you’re alarmed by either of those, you just need to think these both cancel each other out, so I’m basically a formless grey rock with nothing interesting to even talk about, so it’s okay."
26:10 “Instagram is nice because you're like ‘oh I follow my friends, these are what they’re up to, oh my friends are so attractive and have so much more fun than me and they’re so good at taking selfies and I’m just a really ugly rat that needs to drown’. Sometimes I feel like that because of Instagram, but it’s mostly pleasant.”
29:29 “What’s up with Dan. What’s up with Dan. Why doesn’t he tweet about the boring shit that he’s up to? Because he doesn’t want to be boring. Why doesn’t he make more shitty videos? Because he wants to make quality content even if it isn’t. Why doesn’t Dan post selfies? We can argue about all of these things, I think we can agree there’s really not anything wrong with posting selfies, so perhaps I should post more selfies. Who. fricking. knows. honestly."
30:15 “Oh, the polar bear cakes. They’re from a gay— a ‘gay-kery’? ‘Rainbow cakes, a diverse bakery’-- I think we’d all shop there.”
30:25 (chat) Thoughts on the Shane situation?
“I have no idea what that is— you have no idea how out of the loop I am and probably want to be. You just need to think to yourself, ‘Does Dan want to know’? The answer is: Dan probably doesn’t want to know.”
(Chris was asked about it in his liveshow today too and actually looked it up to see what it was about. It’s a mangled mess of unreliable narrators though so fair enough for Dan staying out of it I suppose.)
33:30 piano talk: “You need to chill [about him playing the piano], it’s an affront to everybody that can actually play the piano. Please don’t get excited for me playing 4 wrong notes, it makes me really upset for all the people that are actually good at piano. I’m just being real."
(He doesn’t want people making a big deal out of something he doesn’t think he's that great at, finds it embarrassing. Which is why he doesn’t play anymore on camera probs, so people don’t overly worship average skills just because they like him as a person. Stans with no objective sense of quality screaming how great he is at everything ultimately means nothing and makes him immune to actual feedback which, imo, probably leads him to lean to a more negative view of anything he does to balance out the terrifying and meaningless echo chamber of blind and deafening praise)
36:20 Yes he’s seen the Heaven video. "emotional, so good, cannot wait for more new Troye music”
38:00 (chat) Why are you so awkward?
“I don’t know. Why am I so awkward? I think, why I was not more confident as a child.. dunno. Was it how I was raised? My parents didn’t sit me down and encourage me enough. Were there too many overbearing kids at school that made me feel quiet? I don’t know. I’m just awkward. It’s just a part of me.”
41:25 “Well, if me being me makes you happy, then that makes me feel better about me. Because I’m sure, just like all of you, I’m sad about me sometimes. I’m like, 'Who is me? Do I like me? Is me good? Do other people like me?' And you can spend a lot of time laying awake at night thinking about these things, but if you say that it’s made you happy, then maybe I should just stop caring for a moment and go, ‘Whatever. Yeah.’ So thanks for that."
55:20 (chat) Soz for cyberbullying you last Tuesday
That’s okay, because I consent to it.
55:40 (chat) We need Truth or Dare 6
“No, you don’t, Dan has stopped doing those. Because, we can argue about this. What is creative integrity? Is it important? Does anybody give a shit? Is Dan’s content good? Does he think it’s good? Does he worry too much? Is it important to try—
I deemed Truth or Dare— it’s just a bit stupid and I couldn’t be bothered, so there we go. You can argue about it. I’ve just lost interest. The thing is, about problems, there’s a lot of terrible things in the world, so I find it hard to spend time or dedicate emotions to trivial issues. Sometimes other people are like, ‘Dan, give me your juicy opinion on this internet drama someone’s involved in’ and I’m like, ‘Literally Trump. Do you think I fuckin-- have even been on Twitter and know what’s happening? No! I don’t care!”
11:00 (chat) Tips for when you catch feels for somebody
“Well, you know, you could always just try to be their friend, see if there’s any romantic tingles, see where it leads you. Or you can always just stalk their interests and completely transform yourself to be the kind of person you think they’d like and then marry them, have a happy family, then eventually have a breakdown because you’ll be like ‘I’m not being the person I want to be but my god, this person’s so hot, THE ABS, was it worth it, sacrificing my authenticity?? I just don’t know!’ Um and then write a book about it because that seems pretty interesting."
(I’ll accept projection onto the first sentence, but the rest of it no, shut up Twitter. Writing a book about it =/= tabinof/dapgo as he was talking about writing about a giant failure, as in a tell-all. Unless you want to go with ‘Dan transformed his interests to match those of Phil to get him and now is trapped in an inauthentic life based on superficial interests'. And also pretend that Phil has abs. You do you.)
14:15 (chat) Would you rather be always right or always liked by others?
“It’s that whole thing. Especially if you’re a creative person. Should I just do what I like, or should I do things that I think will be popular so I’m successful? That’s the YT dilemma. I think generally, as various existential philosophers have said, what’s important is authenticity. Because if you try to be successful or popular or liked by people, but not being authentic to yourself, then you’ll never really be happy."
(the upcoming struggle of 'Dan vs. 2017' in a tidy little paragraph)
21:15 (chat) I just watched some old videos of yours
“Ha ha ha! Don’t do that.”
24:25 “They say that people have 2 modes. I have 2 modes: full on nihilist or wholesome. I’m either talking about death, wanting death, joking about death, or I’m saying, ‘Hey be calm, take a deep breath, everything’s cool, Wholesome Howell, everything’s nice’. I have no in-between. Literally there’s no chill. Life or death, it’s full on nihilism or wholesomeness. And that’s just me. And if you’re alarmed by either of those, you just need to think these both cancel each other out, so I’m basically a formless grey rock with nothing interesting to even talk about, so it’s okay."
26:10 “Instagram is nice because you're like ‘oh I follow my friends, these are what they’re up to, oh my friends are so attractive and have so much more fun than me and they’re so good at taking selfies and I’m just a really ugly rat that needs to drown’. Sometimes I feel like that because of Instagram, but it’s mostly pleasant.”
29:29 “What’s up with Dan. What’s up with Dan. Why doesn’t he tweet about the boring shit that he’s up to? Because he doesn’t want to be boring. Why doesn’t he make more shitty videos? Because he wants to make quality content even if it isn’t. Why doesn’t Dan post selfies? We can argue about all of these things, I think we can agree there’s really not anything wrong with posting selfies, so perhaps I should post more selfies. Who. fricking. knows. honestly."
30:15 “Oh, the polar bear cakes. They’re from a gay— a ‘gay-kery’? ‘Rainbow cakes, a diverse bakery’-- I think we’d all shop there.”
30:25 (chat) Thoughts on the Shane situation?
“I have no idea what that is— you have no idea how out of the loop I am and probably want to be. You just need to think to yourself, ‘Does Dan want to know’? The answer is: Dan probably doesn’t want to know.”
(Chris was asked about it in his liveshow today too and actually looked it up to see what it was about. It’s a mangled mess of unreliable narrators though so fair enough for Dan staying out of it I suppose.)
33:30 piano talk: “You need to chill [about him playing the piano], it’s an affront to everybody that can actually play the piano. Please don’t get excited for me playing 4 wrong notes, it makes me really upset for all the people that are actually good at piano. I’m just being real."
(He doesn’t want people making a big deal out of something he doesn’t think he's that great at, finds it embarrassing. Which is why he doesn’t play anymore on camera probs, so people don’t overly worship average skills just because they like him as a person. Stans with no objective sense of quality screaming how great he is at everything ultimately means nothing and makes him immune to actual feedback which, imo, probably leads him to lean to a more negative view of anything he does to balance out the terrifying and meaningless echo chamber of blind and deafening praise)
36:20 Yes he’s seen the Heaven video. "emotional, so good, cannot wait for more new Troye music”
38:00 (chat) Why are you so awkward?
“I don’t know. Why am I so awkward? I think, why I was not more confident as a child.. dunno. Was it how I was raised? My parents didn’t sit me down and encourage me enough. Were there too many overbearing kids at school that made me feel quiet? I don’t know. I’m just awkward. It’s just a part of me.”
41:25 “Well, if me being me makes you happy, then that makes me feel better about me. Because I’m sure, just like all of you, I’m sad about me sometimes. I’m like, 'Who is me? Do I like me? Is me good? Do other people like me?' And you can spend a lot of time laying awake at night thinking about these things, but if you say that it’s made you happy, then maybe I should just stop caring for a moment and go, ‘Whatever. Yeah.’ So thanks for that."
55:20 (chat) Soz for cyberbullying you last Tuesday
That’s okay, because I consent to it.
55:40 (chat) We need Truth or Dare 6
“No, you don’t, Dan has stopped doing those. Because, we can argue about this. What is creative integrity? Is it important? Does anybody give a shit? Is Dan’s content good? Does he think it’s good? Does he worry too much? Is it important to try—
I deemed Truth or Dare— it’s just a bit stupid and I couldn’t be bothered, so there we go. You can argue about it. I’ve just lost interest. The thing is, about problems, there’s a lot of terrible things in the world, so I find it hard to spend time or dedicate emotions to trivial issues. Sometimes other people are like, ‘Dan, give me your juicy opinion on this internet drama someone’s involved in’ and I’m like, ‘Literally Trump. Do you think I fuckin-- have even been on Twitter and know what’s happening? No! I don’t care!”
Like I'm worn down at this point, the energy to continue being upset or surprised about a lot of things has just left my body, I am a shell, but for things like this (less so 'internet drama' a la Blackery, more so actual concerning hate speech that adds no value to the world (in humour, in commentary, in entertainment 
