cora808 wrote:Depression: There's a whoollee lot of projection going on in the phandom re: that topic. But as some of you mentioned, most people go through bouts of situational depression in their pre-teens and teens. It's normal, it's often hormonal, and it's a part of life. Kids struggle. It's part of becoming your own person. Struggles with identity and society and really just becoming aware of the world around you and the reality of your part in it all. That being said, often times people who struggle with clinical depression hide it rather well and are not often going to wear it like a t-shirt. Depression can be hidden, even moreso if you choose what parts of yourself to publicly show the internet/world. Unless he outright said "yes, I have clinical depression.", then we will literally never know for sure.
Absolutely agree with this difficulty, and you put it well. except your point kind of highlights why it is so damaging to equate institutional diagnosis as the only accepted method of receiving empathy or having a relatable connection with others who may be suffering.
Dan literally said depression was in his head in march 2014:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxNUqRZ ... l=catrific
7.50
and many, many more things beyond that narrow institutional diagnosis label over the years about being unhappy, and social anxiety. and yet, the (very western, i might add) trend over the last 15-20 years has been to ignore what people express and close down conversations until they seek help from within a sanctified institution, and legitimise their feelings in a way that abdicates responsibility slightly from those around them. the 'sick' are sick, the healthy are healthy, being sad is unhealthy and not worthy of a discussion unless it is framed in the context of trying to get healthier. i absolutely detest this rhetoric. it is very strong in youtube fandoms, also, i've noticed. (possibly the tumblr generation vs people who think Zoella is a lazy shit instead of a GAD sufferer).
arm-chair diagnosing a stranger and stating it as truth is poor form, but dismissing someone's own expressions about their experience is 110% just as shitty. i fail to see what the typicality of teenagers being depressed has to do with a nearly 25 year old man's back catalogue of self-expression on this issue. i hate seeing people's struggles minimised because they haven't made definitive statements, just as someone's sexuality is constantly minimised for the same reason.
Bassoonage wrote:Ok this is the last post I'm going to make because I don't feel like being attacked anymore. I did say he and Phil are probably bisexual. I also said that sexuality was on a sliding scale. If you are used to being attacked and you natural instinct was to attack back then I'm sorry. That is just not the norm for me.
I'm not an idiot when it comes to gender and sexuality studies, I've actually taken many classes on gender and sexuality and attend conferences regularly to see how we can help all people in the music world regardless of gender identification and sexual preference be seen as equals.
I'm sorry that your natural instinct was to jump down my throat and attack me and laugh at me because you made assumptions about who I am as a person and what I believe.
Also about my "privilege" I don't know what that means, or how you jumped to that conclusion. And it's not that I don't have a thick skin, I just don't have time to fight with people on a forum at midnight.
Again, not fighting with you. if post your opinions freely, you are going to have people feeling upset over them and wanting to figure out where they come from. which part feels like a 'fight', to you? you're also free to defend yourself, as you have above, and as have the queer people reading your posts.
This is something I see over and over again online, and it doesn't seem to be getting better over the years. I'm really irked by people feeling hurt and assuming they've been called an idiot, when their understanding of an issue they don't experience is challenged. It is ludicrous to me - it would be like me to trying to shame someone of colour for having an adverse reaction to my opinion on their struggles with race. (I am white, by the way!). No amount of classes will ever make me feel black. or have to experience what it feels like to walk through society as someone of ethnicity. the best thing i can do is LISTEN, to those that do. an example of this would be
alittledizzy, who just gave a more detailed response about why she was hurt, as a queer person. I'm disappointed that didn't receive your attention, though that is partly my fault for contributing a response that made you want to defend yourself morseo than acknowledge her. I've made incredibly dumb statements in the past trying to equate my experience to those of people who are non-white, and I got shot down for them massively. thank god i did, because I walked away having learned something.
getting shitty at feeling like you're being assumed unintelligent and making people feel ashamed for hurting, and then leaving the conversation without addressing the hurt you provoked in others with your way of interpreting something is a privileged and selfish response, if you needed an another concrete example of what i was talking about. both myself doing that when talking to people of colour in years gone past, and yourself here, tonight.
2old4thisshite if you wanted to come back and discuss your pearl-clutching queers opinion we're all ears. {{clutches my necklace}}
In other news, this is so goddamn adorable:
makes me wanna burst through that backdrop and do this.
I'll make my exit. Goodnight.
